Go ahead and shift down, thats what the owner's manual says to do. On 8 or 9 % grades shift into 1st (you have to be below 15 mph for the transmission to manually shift into 1st).
Use of 2nd gear will not hurt the transmission because the maximum drag you can get from the engine is about 70 HP at 2700-2800 rpm. 70 hp is nothing compared to 220+ hp you can run thru it the other direction.
It gives some small increase to operate the air conditioner even if it is cool out (another 3-4 HP).
With the engine at 2500 to 3000 rpm braking in 2nd or 1st, the transmission pump is operating at 2700 to 3300 rpm and providing maximum transmission fluid flow.
I have put hundreds of miles on while engine braking in 2nd and 1st. My transmission temp is below 150 in 2nd, I have seen 180 on a long 9% grade in 1st. I installed front brake pads at 50,000 miles and 30,000 miles was towing in the mountains.
My GVW is 18,000. If you are towing 14,000 you might consider a DTT upgrade and exhaust brake. The 70 braking HP you get without an exhaust brake is marginal for stopping 21,000+ lbs.