Here I am

"Bless Your Heart" Contest (Ends: July 31, 2011)

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Another "Best Caption" Contest . . . (Ends August 1, 2011)

Pacbrake 50% off contest (ends November 30, 2011)

Ole Blue"

>

>

>

> A young cowboy from Texas goes off to college.

> Half way through the semester, having foolishly

> squandered all his money ... . he calls home.

>

> "Dad," he says, "You won't believe what modern education

> is developing! They actually have a program here in Missoula

> that will teach our dog, Ole' Blue how to talk!"

>

> "That's amazing," his Dad says. "How do I get Ole' Blue

> in that program?"

>

> "Just send him down here with $1,000" the young cowboy says

> "and I'll get him in the course. "

>

> So, his father sends the dog and $1,000.

>

> About two-thirds of the way through the semester,

> the money again runs out. The boy calls home.

>

> "So how's Ole' Blue doing son?" his father asks.

>

> "Awesome, Dad, he's talking up a storm," he says, "but you

> just won't believe this -- they've had such good results

> they have started to teach the animals how to read!"

>

> "Read!?" says his father, "No kidding! How do we get Blue

> in that program?"

>

> "Just send $2,500, I'll get him in the class. "

> The money promptly arrives. But our hero has a problem.

>

> At the end of the year, his father will find out the dog

> can neither talk, nor read.

>

> So he shoots the dog.

>

> When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father

> is all excited.

>

> "Where's Ole' Blue? I just can't wait to see him read

> something and talk!"

>

> "Dad," the boy says, "I have some grim news. Yesterday

> morning, just before we left to drive home, Ole' Blue was

> in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading

> the Wall Street Journal, like he usually does".

>

> "Then Ole' Blue turned to me and asked, “ so, is your daddy

> still messing around with that little redhead who lives

> down the street?"

>

> The father went white and exclaimed, "I hope you shot

> that son of a ***** before he talks to your Mother!"

>

> "I sure did, Dad!"

>

> "That's my boy!"

>

> The kid went on to law school, and now serves in

> Washington D. C. as a Congressman .

>
 
An eight year old boy asked his single mom how old she was. "I'm not going to tell you, you'll blab it all over the neighborhood" was her reply. Hummm, he said, and walked off. About two hours later, he walked up to his mom and said, "Mommie, you're 27 years old, with blond hair, green eyes, and weigh 118 pounds". "Oh, you little sneak, you found my drivers license" she said as she ruffled his hair. "Yes, and I also learned why Daddy left!"... . "YOU GOT AN F IN SEX!"... . bless his heart. <G>
 
And the winner is ...

Winners will be posted by the end of day - August 1, 2011. Thanks for the laughs, and keep the posts coming.
 
And the winner REALLY is ...

The winning posts were selected at random (OK, I picked one because I just liked it - snicker). Congratulations to:



#12 - RedRamAndy

#9 - ata

#6 - grizzly

#18 - 04blackcherry

#24 - EWingesahn



Each of you will receive a one-year complimentary renewal to the TDR!



And the crowd cheered!
 
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