"PURPLE PARROT"
A man boards an airliner, takes his seat, and is surprised to find a
large purple parrot in the seat next to him.
The aircraft takes off and a pretty flight attendant walks down the
aisle past the man and his seat mate.
"Hey, *****", says the parrot, "bring me a whiskey and soda, and make it
snappy!"
The FA looks annoyed, but walks on. A minute later, she walks back up
the aisle again.
"Doggone it, you lazy *****, where's my whiskey? Hurry it up! "
Visibly flustered, the FA hurries up the aisle and returns quickly with
the parrot's drink.
Impressed with the parrot's technique, the man decides to get some quick
service for himself.
"Hey, slut" says the man, "get me a dry martini. And don't drag your
sorry *** - I want it right now!"
The FA turns red with anger and runs to the front of the plane. In
moment she returns with the First Officer and two burly male flight
attendants.
The crewmen seize the passenger and the parrot, jerk open the emergency
door, and hurl them both out of the airplane at 20,000 feet.
As the two are hurled out the door, the parrot says to the man, "Ya know, for someone
who can't fly, you got a lotta balls. "
also
An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost
everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move
apart and then slide back together again.
The boy asked, 'What is this Father?'
The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, 'Son, I have never
seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is'
While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat, old lady
in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls
opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed
and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls
light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last
number and then the numbers began to light in the r everse order. Finally the
walls
opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year- old blonde stepped out.
The father said quietly to his son..... 'Go get your mother. '
A man boards an airliner, takes his seat, and is surprised to find a
large purple parrot in the seat next to him.
The aircraft takes off and a pretty flight attendant walks down the
aisle past the man and his seat mate.
"Hey, *****", says the parrot, "bring me a whiskey and soda, and make it
snappy!"
The FA looks annoyed, but walks on. A minute later, she walks back up
the aisle again.
"Doggone it, you lazy *****, where's my whiskey? Hurry it up! "
Visibly flustered, the FA hurries up the aisle and returns quickly with
the parrot's drink.
Impressed with the parrot's technique, the man decides to get some quick
service for himself.
"Hey, slut" says the man, "get me a dry martini. And don't drag your
sorry *** - I want it right now!"
The FA turns red with anger and runs to the front of the plane. In
moment she returns with the First Officer and two burly male flight
attendants.
The crewmen seize the passenger and the parrot, jerk open the emergency
door, and hurl them both out of the airplane at 20,000 feet.
As the two are hurled out the door, the parrot says to the man, "Ya know, for someone
who can't fly, you got a lotta balls. "
also
An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost
everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move
apart and then slide back together again.
The boy asked, 'What is this Father?'
The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, 'Son, I have never
seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is'
While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat, old lady
in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls
opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed
and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls
light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last
number and then the numbers began to light in the r everse order. Finally the
walls
opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year- old blonde stepped out.
The father said quietly to his son..... 'Go get your mother. '
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