Great Smoke Stories!

[C. Harlan]

I think I take the cake for a great in-the-window puff of smoke I let out on the way home from dropping some cows off at the sale. Some ignorant girl, maybe in mid 20's or so, jumped out in the left lane doing about 55 while I had a 24' steel cattle trailer, doing around 70-75... I did what anyone would do-- Ride her but, and wait for her to move over. :-laf Well, as I came around her, I happened to notice she was going out of her way, driving with her knee, holding the phone with her left hand, and rolling down the window with the right. As I began to pass, I noticed she was telling me I was #1, only with the wrong finger! So, now I did what anyone with a BOMB'd motor would do!!! I slowed down, grabbed 3rd gear, let her get just a little bit in front of me, and spooled up the HX40, sending a huge nasty cloud of unburned fuel into the cab of that little jetta! :-laf I am sure she was already doing the #@$%! thing, but hey, in Texas, there are signs that say "LEFT LANE FOR PASSING ONLY" and "KEEP TEXAS MOVING (Moooooving in my case!); SLOWER TRAFFIC KEEP RIGHT"... . I guess she was illiterate or something, but I got the last laugh!!! Anyone else have any good stories of smoke shows on the unsuspecting????? Feel free to respond!!



-Chris-

 

[WKener]

Just the other day, I was stopped at a light downtown and a little car pulled up next to me, with "NON EMISSION VEHICLE" pasted all over it. My buddy in the passenger seat leans out and yelled "that's things all electric?" The guy nodded, and then my buddy asked "Is it pretty quick?" to which he only looked at us funny and then looked away. We persisted and he became visibly agitated... So when the light turned green, I was sure to let him know that I certainly am not a non-emission vehicle With the broken exhaust hanger I currently have, the exhaust tip points slightly upwards, and right at open windows in small cars... He was maaaaad

 

[WadePatton]

Well, I like trees as much as the next guy... so long as the next guy heats with wood and finds them awfully convenient for hang deer stands on.



So I've dusted a few tailgaters buy haven't yet found the ideal thumper skate to FOG. I almost had one the other night but he was three cars up in city traffic.



I have been practicing my technique---there will be a tale.



And for further adult entertainment see another thread on this called "fun with smoke"

 

[esommer2500]

I got one a couple of weeks ago. Girfriend and I were headed home from college for the weekend and came to a stoplight before we got out of town. Couldn't even hear my truck over the blaring music obviously coming from the passenger side of my truck. I rolled down the passenger window and girlfriend politely let the individual know she was not impressed. The gentlemen then proceeds to turn UP his stereo and on top of that wind out his little four-cylinder with super-sized exhaust. He made the mistake of leaving his windows down and I trounced the throttle on the ole Cummins a couple of times, filling that custom interior with good smelling black stuff. Oo. Then he thought he was going to leave me after the light turned green. Nope. All in all it was a good day, and I haven't seen my girlfriend laugh that hard in a long time!

 

[Bandit1]

back in the summer i was goin to a viewing for my girlfriends nanna and i was sitting at a stoplight in downtown fredrick, in front of me in between stoplights was this this white caddilac with white leather interior and the guy was stopped int he middle of the road talking to some porchpeople on the side. i drove up behind him and he jsut waved his hand, well to me that was the "go ahead and smoke me cause i am a moron" wave. well i did jsut that, filled his white caddy w/white leather interior white black smoke, he was he flew up behind me later down the road and waved his fist at me so i gave him round 2 of the smoke and flew on down the road.

 

[nfox]

Lost in Black Cloud

I was sitting at the drive through window at McDonalds the other night and there was four kids on mopeds behind me in the drive through line, and one of the kids put his front wheel of his moped against my draw bar and it was enough to nugde my pick-up alittle bit, so i got my food and when i took off in second and stepped on it the 370's left them in a nice black cloud of smoke, i could see the one kid was coughing. Oo.

 

[Deezul1]

A while back on a residentail street with a bit of traffic on it 2 pieces human debris, you know the kind that walk like chickens? anyway they were walking down the middle of the lane and holding up traffic and laffing and looking behind them at the trouble they were causing and there were maybe 10 cars trying to get passed them. So when my turn came, it was full throttle in 3rd at 5mph. when the smoke cleared I could see them laying on someones lawn coughing and the guy behind me was almost hysterical he was laughing so hard.

The other good one one was some rastafarian bozo in a real POS toyota that I think didnt even have windows but had a real loud stereo and made the mistake of being on my right side when the light turned. My wife asked what is wrong with that guy as he came up beside us and was yelling and jumping around. She had no idea what had happened and I said aw I dont know, maybe his loud radio made him nuts.

 

[KennyM]

I had this little Saturn just stop in front of me, no warning, nothing. I was in fifth gear and jammed on my brakes to miss him/her. I stayed in fifth was going about 35 and floored it, this just erased his car when I passed him. The best one I have done yet.

 

[Got Smoke?]

I had just gotten back from Black Mountain's grand opening with my new "Smoke Improved" CTD. While at the shop Daniel (CMNS PWR) promptly removed my rack stop where I could live up to my name!!



Got back in town and did a drive by of my local hang out to show some friends. Well a female friend pulls in in her orange red Mustang (box style) and I informed her it was a good thing she hadn't been behind me earlier and why and tried my best to explain it to a female :-laf



Well anyways then cell phones start going off like crazy and we all split ways and as I'm heading to my girlfriends house guess who falls in behind me! Smoke Show time!



So I started off from a stop light going up hill, wound out 2nd hit 3rd and on to 4th. Just as I hit forth I see the mustang coming up behind me... ... ... short shift to 5th give it a second for the RPM's to come down and PUNCH IT! No more mustang can't even see the head lights at 8:30PM!! Oo. Oo. Oo.



She pulled up beside me and she had a friend in the shotgun seat and she looks up and says "why would you want your truck to do that?" and I just

 

[Snow man]

Last week, I was on my way to work,there was a big rig in front of me,going out of the 30mph zone,he was going slow,but there was no where to pass,so i followed at a safe distance anf waited patiently,well up on my rear comes 2 high school kids in a red celica,well they tailgated me so bad,that i couldnt even see the car in my rearview,literally drafting me 2 ft off my bumper,trying to push me faster. This went on for about 1/2 mi Well i reached down,turned the comp from 1x1,quickly up top 5x5,stabbed the mystery switch into locked position,and I kinda drifted towards the centerline,to get my pipe dead center in front of the Celica. I stomped it from zero boost,and low RPM. With my new Bully dog 7's. I literally erased that car,it was gone,totally,I mean no where to be found. I know i sooted his hood,and windshield,thats how close he was to me. Those 7;s really keep tailgaters at a distance

 

[Champane Flight]

Bad name......

And now we wonder where the bad name for diesel comes from?

 

[Deezul1]

Yes, garbage trucks, buses and dump trucks

 

[WadePatton]

Power to smoke corrupts

Hey, it's not like we're going after innocent bystanders.



These folks are asking for it--and I'll give it to 'em.

 

[jstarnes]

well

theres a long grade on the way to my house Im headed home from a trip to home depot,I round the corner and have to stop because of 3 pedalpower monkeys stoped in THE MIDDLE of the road to change one of there tubes(first off there is plenty of room on the side of the road for them to do there work) so I have to wait for a couple of cars to go by befor I can pass,last car passes and I turn the wheel plant the right foot on my old first gen(pump was turned up a bit to high)and lefr all 3 standing in a huge cloud of diesel smoke I would have payed money for a pic of the

that all 3 of them gave me !!!

 

[Champane Flight]

Yea!

Yea, one act of ignorance deserves another.

 

[WadePatton]

JS-- Easy on the "pedal power monky" business. I'm a cyclist! Even so, I'd probably doused them too.



CF-- Isn't that the human way? Ignorance vs. Intolerance?



You don't have to smoke if you don't want to-geez. I'm not going to argue the merits of selective sooting. I'm not going to argue on here at all. PM or email if you want to really fuss with me about it.

 

[Sky]

Its been brought to my attention that I had a few fans of my story last year involving a stuck up rich Bi*&# I will post my story:



quote: 05-18-2001 12:32 PM

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Originally posted by Sky

LOL, that brings up a mean thing I did this week. I pulled up next to a BMW at a light on the left hand side and I was in the turning lane, and the car was going straight. So the lady had her window down and she had a friend. I looked over and she was making these "gesters" at me. So I leaned over and said "what", then she said "could you turn that loud rattling thing off", "Its very annoying" I was looking at her like OMG, you got to be kidding me. So I was a little pi$$ed off, because of this rich "prissy" lady said this to me that you can tell she always gets her way. Well Not TODAY. The left arrow turned green, I leaned over and yelled "my truck smokes real bad too" And with the EZ on the most aggresive setting and a gas peddle through the floor board, I think I got that beemer full of black smoke! By the time I left that intersection I couldnt even see that BMW, but I know it was in a big black cloud of smoke somewhere! Yeah it was mean but maby she will shut her trap next time.

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I almost forgot how mean I can be. Oo. Oooooo how I wish I had my DD2's and Comp and straight pipe back then. BRRRRAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPP LOL she would have just freaked. I still see her once in awhile nose is still hitting the roof of the car. What would you do if someone said turn that off? LOL, I always get the people saying "thats loud". Now I just say "WHAT" "WHAT DID YOU SAY" . Its just as bad when people say to me "your tall" (Im 6'8") REALLY?? Ummm ok, thanks??? How do you respond? Anyway! Smoke On!!

 

[Hummin Cummins]

Amish Buggys... . too numerous to mention. All I have to do is get a stamp of a buggy and stamp them on my fender like the fighter pilots do



We have a 79 CF Mack fire engine. Smokes black as coal. At parades I try hard not to smoke anyone sitting on the ground watching the parade, but... ..... some punk (prolly 16 or so) was walking behind us through most of the parade, grabbing candy before the little ones could get it. I caught him in the spot mirror on the officers side bent over picking up a piece right by the tail pipe. Boy does a 237 mack / allison auto smoke when stomped from an idle. The kid jumped about 3' in the air. Didn't see him the rest of the parade. Nothin makes me more nervous than driving through a parade with wee ones running all around grabbing candy.

Chris

 

[Will24]

haha hummin



We just sold our 80 cf600 to a guy in tennessee, boy, that sucker even smoked at idle in the bay waiting for air pressure



We still have or 85 MC though, I smoked out the EVOC instructor in that truck



-Will

 

[E7mack96]

Deezul 1 - I think you need to leave dump trucks out of this.