Moooo

[Doc Tinker]

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?





Doc

 

[jwdeeming]

Right. And who was the first person to look at a chicken and say, "I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's rear end. "

 

[Doc Tinker]

Caffeine In Milk?

"Hyper Cow, a new brand from Maplewood-based milk producer Schroeder Co. , wins the dubious distinction of being the first caffeinated milk beverage"

 

[Doc Tinker]

And for the farm cat, we have cat milk. Wonder if any people drink this stuff?



http://www.petguys.com/-058496713260.html





Doc

 

[Doc Tinker]

Donkey milk is great for the skin



http://www.institutoeuropeodelbienestar.com/eng/soaps.asp



Doc

 

[TomGolden]

Yeah, and explain Rocky Mountain Oysters!

Some good points have been made about who was the first to try...



But, my biggest question has always been:



Who was the first caveman to decide eating testicles was a good idea? I mean, how flippin' hungry would you have to be, before you decided to eat that??

 

[Jengle]

Hey,

Calf fries, served up by the Cattlemen's Cafe in OK City are great.

 

[jwdeeming]

There's always Severance, Colorado!



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[klenger]

Recipe - Rocky Mountain Oysters



2 pounds fresh testicles

1 cup floor

1/4 cup cornmeal

1 cup red wine

salt

black pepper

garlic powder

Louisiana Hot Sauce

cooking oil



With a very sharp knife, split the tough skin-like muscle that surrounds each "oyster". Remove the skin. Set the "oysters" into a pan with enough salt water to cover them for one hour (this takes out some of the blood). Drain. Transfer "oysters" to large pot. Add enough water to float "oysters" and a generous tablespoon of vinegar. Parboil, drain, and rinse. Let cool and slice each "oyster" into 1/4" thick ovals. Sprinkle salt and pepper on both sides of sliced "oyster" to taste.



Mix flour, cornmeal and some garlic powder to taste in a bowl. Roll each "oyster" slice into this dry mixture. Dip into milk. Dip into dry mixture. Dip into wine quickly (you may repeat the procedure if a thicker crust is desired). Place each "oyster" into hot cooking oil.



Add hot sauce to cooking oil (to taste). Cook until golden brown or tender, and remove with a slotted spoon or wire strainer. (careful the longer they cook, the tougher they will become)



Drain on paper towels and serve.



http://www.beavercleaver.net/recipe.htm

 

[RustyJC]

It's always fun to take the unsuspecting stranger into a restaurant where "Calf Fries" are on the menu!



Rusty

 

[jwdeeming]

Baxter Black - Oysters



The sign upon the cafe wall said OYSTERS: fifty cents

"How quaint," the blue-eyed sweetheart said, with some

bewildermence.

"I didn't know they served such fare out here upon the plain?"

"Oh, sure," her cowboy date replied, "We're really quite urbane. "





"I would guess they're Chesapeake or Blue Point, don't you think?"

"No, ma'am, they're mostly Hereford cross... and usually they're pink.

"But I've been cold, so cold myself, what you say could be true

"And if a man looked close enough, their points could sure be blue!"





She said, "I gather them myself out on the bay alone.

"I pluck them from the murky depths and smash them with a stone!"

The cowboy winced imagining a calf with her beneath

"Me I use a pocket knife, and yank them with my teeth. "





"Oh, my!" she said, "You animal! How crude and unrefined

"Your masculine assertiveness sends shivers up my spine.

"But I prefer a butcher knife too dull to really cut

"I wedge it in on either side and pry it like a nut!





"I pry them out. If they resist, sometimes I use the pliers

"Or even Grandpa's pruning shears if that's what it requires!"

The hair stood on the cowboy's neck. His stomach did a whirl.

He'd never heard such grisly talk, especially from a girl!





"I like them fresh," the sweetheart said and laid her menu down

Then ordered oysters for them both when the waiter came around.

The cowboy smiled gamely, though her words stuck in his craw

But he finally fainted dead away when she said, "I'll have mine raw!"

 

[Doc Tinker]

A 1,000 pound cow produces an average of 10 tons of manure a year

 

[JSmith]

Doc, it was calfman:-laf :-laf :-laf