More Dumb Things Ricers Do

[rbattelle]

I've got to get this off my chest...



I've noticed more and more among the ricer crowd people with those large Autometer memory tachometers with a SHIFT LIGHT on an AUTOMATIC!



Also, there seems to be a competition to see who can put the biggest sticker across their windshield or rear window. Most popular around here is "APC". Of course, APC makes purely cosmetic stuff like clear tail light covers. But man, put on one of their stickers and you immediately gain 35 horsepower and cut your 1/4 mile by 3 seconds!



I'm convinced that the object to these cars is to just place as many "things" on them as possible. More "things" = more power.

 

[C. Harlan]

Let them think what they want... when they get their arse kicked by an 8100 lb CTD, they usually dont get the hint, and want more. . It's the chrome that makes my extra HP!! hehe, oh well, my $. 02 worth. .



-Chris-

 

[Jeff Clark]

I like the people with the APC sticker on their vehicle when they don't have a single thing made by APC on it. It must be on their other car.



What's with all the ricers in primer? That must be so when they lose they can blame it on all the extra drag the primer creates.

 

[rbattelle]

I see mostly guys with primer body kits. It's like they were so excited to get the body kit in the mail that they threw it on the car and forgot to paint it first. Some of them also forgot to bolt it on properly.

 

[lmills]

Originally posted by Jeff Clark

What's with all the ricers in primer? That must be so when they lose they can blame it on all the extra drag the primer creates.

That's so when they lose to a guy driving a 3/4 ton diesel, they can change the color of their car and people won't see them later and laugh at them .

 

[Deezul1]

APC banners? he he its the only thing their Moms will let them put on HER car

 

[duaneparks]

I saw this somewhere, and want a bumper sticker made out of it...



My lug nuts take more torque than your Civic's engine makes.



I think that pretty much sums up what I think of "ricers" in general.

 

[Oil Burner]

I had one guy in a ricer in north carolina when we were there on business banging through his automatics gears from light to light. i was crying for that transmission just listening to it. actually, it wasn't even a ricer, it was a riced up cirrus. oh, and we were in the company service van, guess he though we needed to see how his manual, i mean, automatic transmission shifted. if i caught my kid shifting my car like that, i'd slap 'em.

-Jason

 

[parcher]

Wanna hear something sad? That Cirrus may have had "autostick" where it was meant to shifted manually, of course full aut is the default, you have to shift into autostick. Big joke, it's even available on minivans!

 

[rbattelle]

I've taken to calling those mufflers they use "Duck Fart Mufflers", because they sound like 1000 ducks all farting in unison.



In the latest Summit Racing catalog in the section for sport compact "duck fart" mufflers they make the comment "... that sound we all live for... ". Right.

 

[Oil Burner]

Paul,

you know, i thought the same thing, so i took a peak inside at one of the stop lights. strait up automatic transmission, no autostick. i drove one of those once and hated it. anyway, this guy was on pace to trash that car in 5,000-10,000 miles. Hope it was worth it. He obviously didn't pay for it, either.

~Jason

 

[Oil Burner]

"Duck Fart Mufflers"



Well stated.

 

[snowracer69]

#ad




I am a ricer hater to the bone, and my pickup hunts them down for fun.



Had a guy in a Mitsubishi Lancer line up against me two nights ago... I was feeling cocky, so I asked "Is that thing as fast as it looks?" He says "Yeah, it's pretty fast!" I said "lets get it on then. " Well, needless to say, I had no boost built on the launch and pulled him anyway... once I spooled I had to back out of it just to play with him, and yes, he was getting on it, as you can hear those little engines going for all they're worth... I slowed down and let him catch up, and the first words he said were, and I quote "Man, that things quick... . do you have a turbo on it?" LOL I about fell out of my pickup laughing, and said "Yeah, but just a little one!"



Could you imagine the turbo envy all ricers would have if you popped the hood and showed them an HX-40 of my B1? What about twins? And THEN tell them that it's not wastegated and 47 PSI is max boost, unlike the 4. 7 PSI they're used to seeing.



Another funny thing is the time I saw a kid from my school revving his turboed ricer in the parking lot (I did beat him later, with 4 witnesses onboard)... in neutral he was able to build enough boost to blow the pop-off-valve... . I couldn't build boost in my pickup in neutral if I wanted to!!!



I hate 'em... sign me up when we have a demolition-o-ricer derby, and I'll be there.



Josh

 

[Oil Burner]

You know, i love the power block on TNN (spike network) except for that goofy ricer show. i don't even know what it is called but these two guys host the show. Now, i'm a gearhead to the bone, but i would rather watch tennis than this junk. No offense tennis fans, just not for me.

-Jason

 

[Hohn]

My biggest gripe abou the APC stickers is actually the name of the Company itself:



American Products Company



DUH!! You have a company?? and... you make... . PRODUCTS? Well, Dang, that's SUCH an original idea. Rule of thumb-- never put "product" in your company name.

Imagine of IBM was started with the name of "International Products Company". Doesn't say much about what they do, does it?





Truth is, they don't make anything-- they're all made in the Pacific Rim.



The only way to get one of these little ricers to really accelerate is rear-end them at about 50mph with a Reunel-equiped CTD.

 

[Casey Ray]

What's with the wings....

I'm on the way to work the other day and see this small car coming up behind me, then at the last second he pulls into the lane next to me and scoots on by. I wish I had a camera, I actually laughed out loud. It was a Toyota Echo with a wing attached to the trunk lid, painted to match the car.



My only question: WHY?







Bocifus

 

[fj40charles]

I always thought APC was a company that made UPS for computeres. Nothing is more satisfying than smoking out a ricer.

 

[rbattelle]

If you have a front-wheel drive car, why do you want a wing over the REAR wheels? If it were me, I'd put that wing on the hood, where the downforce keeps the drive wheels planted!

 

[Oil Burner]

Even worse, I have seen custom sheetmetal wings on these ricers, in a laughable attempt to look like an F1 car. Problem is, one of the wings I saw was so poorly mounted that the front of the wing was higher than the rear. So, I guess creating "upforce" was the purpose of this wing. Bet he wonders why his car feels real "loose" around 80 mph.

-Jason

 

[nickleinonen]

ever see one that was just pop rivited to the decklid sheet metal? i seen that, and all the sheet metal was warped/distorted from the "downforce" pushing it backwards while this cavilear was going a mad 200 kph [according to the doped up owner] across the hwy 407 [our stupid toll hwy we have in southern ontario - yeah $0. 30 per km ]