Parent's I need your opinion

[DHayden]

I have 2 teenage daughter's 13 and 15. I have 2 son's 5 and 7. Since we moved down to NM I am close to my sister and her 2 daughter's ages 11 and 13. Well My daughter's like to take my son's over to my sister's house with them now and then. For example they were there for 6 hours today. My wife had a fit because we came home and brought the boys back with us. I figure they were there for 6 hours, had some fun and it's time to go and let the girls have an hour or two to themselves.



When I was young I never liked being tied down with the younger kids and especially if they were opposite sex. We didn't have the same interest, weren't as fast and it was a real drag to have them around. Maybe that was the selfish young me but I always looked at it as the parents slacking and sticking the little ones with the older kids so they could have a break and ruin my good time .



Anyhow, I commend my daughter's for wanting to take the boys along for a while but I don't see why they cant have a few hours of piece to talk teenage girl stuff and not have to pack the boys with them.

The other thing came up about them spending the night, I see no reason for young boys to stay with teenage girls, I guess it illudes me. If they were all 5 years old then fine but for the life of me I cannot see the logic in letting young boys stay with teenage girls.



Give me your opinions please, maybe I'm insensitive but my wife is making it a big todo over nothing in my eyes. I think it's because the boys don't have cousins there age to play with and spend the night. Well allot of people didn't have brother's or sister's or cousin's to play with growing up, it's unfortunate but that's the way it is. To me this is not the right way to bridge the gap, 6 hours out of 8 is plenty, definitely more than I would have put up with as a child.

 

[Tony T.]

I agree the girls do need time to themselves being teenagers, and talking girl talk an such with each other. They should not have to watch the younger ones all the time. I know my wife got stuck a lot with having to take care of her younger brother, to much if you ask me. Kids do need a certain amount of responsiblity, but not to the point they almost feel like a second parent. We me, and the wife always watched after our two kids pretty much ourselves, but we have other relatives that would palm off there kids any chance they got with aunts,uncles, and grandparents and thats just not right to me.



Tony

 

[DHayden]

No other input on this? Thanks Tony hopefully I'll get more input, I'd like to know if I'm in majority or minority.

 

[JSmith]

No other input on this? Thanks Tony hopefully I'll get more input, I'd like to know if I'm in majority or minority.

Your wife should chill out. You are 100% right on this topic.

 

[Mike Ellis]

I have been in the same boat, have an older daughter and my sister has girls very nearby. They love to make a big fuss over my boys and the boys love to aggravate them, they'd all spend every moment of every day together if they could.



Unfortunately for them, I am "Neanderthal Dad" and I have no problem grabbing the boys and dragging them off to do less girlie-fied stuff. Made the wife and sister mad on occasion, but I just tell 'em "They ain't girls... " and that's that.

 

[bmoeller]

Just to start off, I've never been married, in my mid-twenties and no kids.



DHayden, I agree with you, too. You are raising boys to be men, not girly men. Don't the boys have male friends to goof off with by now? Can you take the boys to work with you once in a while? I don't know what you do for a living. I got to spend a lot of time with my dad, where he worked (Christian camp/retreat center) growing up. Helped put up many buildings, building and machine maintanance, mowing a couple of hundred acres of lawn, splitting wood (some by hand, 'til they got a hydraulic one to put on the tractor 3pt),stuff like that. Was doing this when I was 9yrs old, too. Even got to learn to drive a tri-axle dump truck (private property, of course ) before I even had a learners permit to drive car.



I wouldn't have a problem with them spending some time together, but that seems to be a bit much.



As far as spending the night, since they are blood relatives, it wouldn't be as bad, but it isn't necessary, unless you and your wife are out of town. Wouldn't want the boys to get the idea of spending the night with girls (and later women), and the same with the girls having guys sleeping over, til they are married and living with their respective spouses. I don't believe in shacking up. Doesn't seem to be popular 'pinion these days, but that is the way I see it.



Call me old fashioned if you want, so be it.



I'm also one who never got to growup around my cousins. I do have 3 younger siblings, though. Three of us four, became good freinds. Used to be with the other one, but she became a prodical. Don't see her much.