Here is what I believe is your smaller connector and the spliced wire that plugs into it.
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Here is the other end that goes into the bottom of that small round termination point (I called it a relay thingy before, it isn't).
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Here is where your ring lug ground wire goes. Mine has the exact same shaped terminal attached to it and it is the very bottom wire attached to this ground point (under the blue wire I added).
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Basically it looks like you may not have either a ground or +12V going to your ECM so this will hopefully help!