Let her (or MAKE her) shoot several guns in several calibers. Is she going to use this for concealed? I have a S&W Airweight in . 38. Very nice, but only 5 rounds. Easy to conceal. We have a Beretta 86 in . 380. Also easy to conceal, but with a lesser caliber. Still wouldn't want to stand in front of it!:-laf If you have an opportunity, try a Ruger SP101 in . 327 Magnum. It's a new round, but supposedly has performance very similar to a . 357 w/out all the recoil and muzzle flash. If you are not going for concealed, I'd look for something with a longer barrel and a grip as large as she can comfortably hold. More control. As far as reliability, all the big names are good guns. You'll hear horror stories about Taurus, Ruger semis, Kel-Tecs, and others. If you're getting it for protection, get the best you can afford. I would not feel unsafe with any gun as long as I am familiar with it, have shot it a lot, and know what ammo it likes and dislikes. For example, my XD40 Tactical will not cycle the last round of PMC 165's. Don't know why. It eats up my hand loads (once I got the crimp right) and loves the 180 grain hollowpoint green box Remingtons. No failures through hundreds of rounds.
If you still aren't sure, get two!:-laf