A thief, or old age

[EZGZ]

Some dirty rat broke into my shop last night or maybe the night before.

He loosened the bulb on my trouble light.

Wound up my extension cord so it will tangle.

Ripped off my 10,13,15MM wrenches and sockets

Stole my 9/16 socket and that handy crescent wrench.

The ¼ and 5/16 nut driver showed up in the corner on the floor.

Used my only Snap on Screwdriver to scrape on something.

Broke the lens on my dial indicator.

Took the key off the cord to my hand drill.

Made off with the 1/8,1/4 and 3/8 drill bits.

Kicked over the old oil filter I was saving to cut open and made a mess.

Used my wrenches and didn’t even wipe them off.

Broke the end on my 16ft measuring tape.

Scratched the lenses all up on my safety goggles.

Used the last of my hand cleaner.

Got into my special flannel ragbag and used them to wipe up oil.

Stripped the gear on my ¼ inch drive ratchet.

Smudged up the pages on my Cummins repair manual.

Used up the last of my paper towels.



At least I think someone broke into my shop? Maybe not? This is just what I have seen so far. Lord only knows what else has been done.



That is how I used to feel when my son finally got old enough to work on his own car. I suggested he buy a little VW bug cause it was cheap and easy to fix. Lots of parts around cheap.

He took my advice and I showed him lots of things. Before long he was teaching me stuff. We learned a lot together but we ended up fighting a lot. He was always late to get to work or had a date or some other lame excuse. I was always screaming at him to pick up his mess and put things back. I pleaded with him to just tell me if he broke something so I could replace it and it would be there when I need it. I always bought him tools for his birthday and Christmas. He got into Vocational school and got the itch for the pricey Snap on Tools. I told him he was crazy. My old Craftsman stuff was good enough for me.

He did get a Sears Roll Away tool chest so he could lock his stuff up and I couldn’t get at that Snap On stuff. (Drool, drool). Did I mention I am cheap?

He moved out as soon as he graduated from High School and took all his stuff with him. I gave him lots of my dads old stuff and I had two’s and threes of lot’s of stuff. I just wanted him to leave my stuff alone and not work on it at my place anymore.



Well, he took my advice. I don’t see him much anymore. He lives in Hawaii now. He hates the winters here even though it is sunny in Colorado much of the time.

He has a old Volkswagen buss over there and keeps it going. He works on other folk’s cars to. Darn kids seem to live on nothing and be happy about it.



It’s been almost 10 years since he left. Things haven’t changed much in my garage. I still can’t find my stuff even when I just had the darn thing in my hand 10 seconds ago. I forget to put things back and get in a hurry for that test drive. Promise myself I will take next Saturday morning and just wipe things down and put it all away. I swear I will tear out all my workbenches and cut them in half. Seems like every flat spot just collects stuff. I am also planning on taking all the doors off my cupboards. I can’t remember what’s behind them. Everything is going in those clear plastic tote trays and tubs so I can stand in the center of my garage and see what everything is. I need more light in there to. They don’t make bulbs as bright as they used to.

You know those annoying little buzzers that tell you your keys are in the ignition or your lights are on. It was the first thing I used to disconnect when I bought a new vehicle. Well, there all working again. I just don’t trust myself.

My son’s old bug is sitting on the side of the garage. I told him I sold it for $2k and sent him the money. He was happy as heck. I figure someday I will restore it and have it painted for him. He can use it if he comes to visit or maybe he will settle down and have a son and I can give it to him. Tell him it was his fathers first car.



Doesn’t seem so important now. Having the tools all in their place. No one to yell and scream at except myself. I guess I was just as much at fault as he was. Probably worse. He found more stuff for me than I accused him of loosing. I would rather have him around the house with grease up to his elbows than endure this loneliness. I love you son.

I miss you tons. I hope you are doing well and don’t repeat my mistakes with your kids.

Love Dad



Sorry guys, I had to vent. I started out writing this as a joke. I thought it was kind of funny at first but by the time I finished I was in tears. Decided I wouldn’t post it and then thought heck. You guys are real people. Maybe someone can learn something from it. This forum is all about give and take. That’s just me. Some folks like me. Some folks don’t.

Would love to get some input back from you guys. Am I the only one that feels like this?

 

[mike r]

We're all in the same boat but you've become the wiser.

 

[kaptn]

Going to give the boy of mine a big hug in a minute.

 

[jaynes]

Wow. I don't have any kids, but that was moving, man. I hope your son comes home and you two can have a nice father-son reunion. Best of luck to you!



Josh

 

[Mundgyver]

I do not have the privelage of having a son. I do have 4 daughters though. They are all moved out now also. I hate getting older as there is no one around to build a tree house for or to help with a science project. I am happy that they like to come visit me though because they want too, not because they have too.

 

[Greenleaf]

I don't have any children..... 'cause I'm scared to death and... ... . ok, I'll admit it, selfish/self-centered.

Was in tears after I read you'r message 'cause I would really love to share my tractor/shooting/Cummins diesel hobbies with a son of my own



Signed;

Not get'n any younger in Ohio

 

[KPolman]

Yeah! He was in my shop too.



VG

 

[Forrest Nearing]

as a son who is finally moving out of his father's garage, I gotta say, that's a touching message you just posted!!

 

[JLEONARD]

If only he didn't smudge the Cummins manual!



My son has his own repair shop and it is exactly as you describe. When he was young he used to hand me wrenches when I was working on my car or truck... . now I hand him wrenches when he works on mine!

Funny how life is.

Jay

 

[MMiller]

Wow. Very touching post. Hopefully I can get through to my son(he's 7 and know's all already) and have some more good times. We used to hang out in the garage with him when he was 2-4 yrs old. Then he started going to preschool, and picked up a lot of attitude problems. Other things have happened too, not all of its his fault, I'll take a lot of the blame too. I just hope that it can be fixed.



Maybe my 10 month old daughter will be into this stuff too!



Michael

 

[camnicolson]

It's a sad fact of life that we don't get any practice runs at being Parents. We only learn as we go along and all learning takes time



These words of wisdom from a guy who is only at year 8 of Fatherhood. Will give Alex a big hug when I get home.



Cheers,

Cam

 

[quilbilly]

Boy, your post made was really something. I think you should polish it up and submit to Readers Digest or something. I have a son and daughter, both in college now. I have built things all their lives, everything from our house to our boat. While they were growing up I always thought they should be a little more interested in building and fixing things than they were. With all the tools and materials I have, I had this idea they would be down there every chance they got, but they weren't. I didn't dwell on it but I have to admit I was a little disappointed. But really they were picking it up by osmosis. Just seeing that it could be done changed their outlook.

When my son was senior in high school he got interested in Battlebots, the fighting robots. All of a sudden he blossomed because he had something he wanted to build. He worked beside me as I was building my boat. He really did it himself but I taught him how to weld, machine and so on. That was some of the most fun we had together. He did remarkably well for an 18 year old and it focused his life and now is studying mechanical engineering. Not one to gush he will often comment on how clueless his peers are about using tools, "They can't even use a screwdriver" and I take that as a compliment. He doesn't come home much, he doesn't like our small town and is in that stage of life to put some distance between him and his parents. A friend of mine described that having children "Is like falling on a grenade. " Afterwards people think you are pretty special but at the time it seems crazy.

I joined TDR because I wanted to rebuild my truck after my daughter crashed it. Since we are on the topic of children, talk about a gut check. She fell asleep, crossed the centerline, sideswiped another car and went in the ditch towing a horse trailer. Miraculously no one was hurt and the trialer was empty. I remind her often about just how lucky she was, skill, good grades, hard work, had nothing to do with it it was a dumb mistake and only dumb luck saved her, and everybody else for that matter. She was supposed to be driving my 1986 Sable station wagon, we were on vacation, and there have been times when I looked at my smashed truck and wished it was the Sable smashed up instead. But then I stop myself and think, who knows if she had been driving that and fell asleep the outcome might have been different, and as much as I like my truck that is a thought that is to hard to bear. Todd

 

[tugboatphil]

Dagonnit! It's sunny and bright out here today and you guys have me crying like a phone company commercial was on!



I spent the better part of my youth living a very selfish life and never had any kids, which seemed good since I never had to see my ex again for anything. Finally found a good woman and straightened out. She had two kids, already grown, and they have accepted and even like me.



We spent a couple weeks last fall redoing her sons bathrooms while he was on a long delayed honeymoon. Her daughter is graduating college this fall and this will be the ?th time I've moved her stuff.



I sometimes wish I had a kid of my own, but that's water under the bridge now. I'm content where I'm at right now and look forward to their kids..... cause we'll be able to spoil them and then send them home!!

 

[GIT-R-DONE]

EZGZ

First off, no you are not the only one that feels this way. Our children didn't come with owners manuals... ... so , make the best of it now. Maybe send him a copy of this post or call him up and read it too him, shoot, maybe even take it to him. One way or another, your boy needs to read it. We are all living on borrowed time, so make the best of it now. Just my . 02



Don

 

[1stgen4evr]

kids and exes

Damn if all this ain't a bit too familiar. One thing I can add is that when the boy has children, he will see the light. My son was sure that I was the meanest sob in the world about the time I told him if he couldn't live by our rules that he could live by himself. A few years later when he woke up with a wife and two kids and no job, he started remembering what dad had hammered in his head and on his butt.



He began to ask a lot of questions of me and now amazingly I have gotten a hell of a lot smarter and not so mean. He thanks me often for the instilled self control that kept him out of jail and away from drugs that some of his friends got into. He in turn is now a good mechanic as well as manager of the hospital ambulances with a paramedic certification. I am proud to say that he saves lives nearly every day. I believe he knows as much as 90% of the doctors about heart attack and burn victims.



So sit tight. Hawaii may not always look so good. We have a way of drifting badk to our roots. Fact is I have enjoyed spending some time at my sons house. Eating his chow. Oh and I borrowed his tool set and never returned it.



In the course of my years I have learned a thing or two. I have had the opportunity to teach in post secondary adult education and that is very satisfying. Chatting with you guys in TDR is equally enjoyable. My dad used to say something like "live and learn, die and forget it all" He passed along quite a bit more than he ever suspected and I am determined to pass a little bit along as well. I see me dad in my son and grandson. I must have done a little right. The thing that makes me the maddest is when I see them doing the stupid stuff that I did that I know the outcome. Some things you just have to feel through your skin to get the picture.



1stgen4evr

James McPherson

 

[billmaine]

I echo the sentiments of all those above. I have two grown sons. When they were young I tried to acquire some basic tools. Like you, I complained when I couldn't find things; blamed them. They're both exceptionally talented mechanics and I truly have no mechanical skills. All my children are and have been the most important thing in my life.



When I wasn't seeing enough of the boys, I went to an extreme but it was worth it. I tore down the old garage I had, burned it, dug up the cement slab. I then invited them to help me pour a new, larger slab, build a three-car, insulated, heated garage. We three built every inch of it ourselves.



Right now my 28 year old's 1985 Blazer sits outdoors waiting for his turn in bay #3 while my 30 year old's 1972 Land Cruiser is inside waiting for body work. The vehicles have been in their respective positions for over a month with no work done on them. My wife hates it. I love it. I see my boys much more frequently and know they'll get to it when they have time. They get a heck of a kick out of knowing more than dad. I also "act" a bit more helpless than I really am sometimes when I need something done on my vehicles and I can always count one or both to help me out. It's a feel-good thing for each of us. We all go away knowing we've helped the other.



And like the man said: Take a trip to Hawaii.

 

[dpuckett]

Good post, EZGZ

I am at that point in my life where the decisions I make in the next year or two will affect the rest of my life. I've made a few mistakes in the last year or two I deeply regret, but they are in the past; all I can do is remember and try to learn from them. Life is too short to be p!ssed at your own flesh and blood all the time; but there is only so much a person can take before it is too much to bear. I say this as I sit here, thinking of my own family (only child; no siblings, at least that I knew growing up), and how wretched they can be to someone who doesn't "open up" at the drop of a hat. A bit hypocritical on my part, I think. But at the same time, I've asked for my space several times, and they refuse to back off, so it is their loss, really. There, now I feel better. Had to get ahold of a Warm Fuzzy Thought they advertised on the radio last week.



So EZGZ, I guess the ball is in his court now. One can only hope he is softer than I am in this department, and come over to your side; that he can forgive and forget and get on with his life. But I can see his point; I absolutely HATE the area I grew up in. So much in fact, that once I get the clearance to leave, from the Most High, Exaulted Nazi Court, I'm never returning, so dont hold that against him in itself. Though I cant im agine why he'd pick Hawaii over Colorado; women must be hotter. Though they are hotter there than here



Daniel

 

[barbwire]

EZGZ

If your words paint pictures, they just painted pictures of my garage & relations with my sons. I wish you all the good luck that we all need.

 

[dseabaugh]

I know exactly how you feel, only it was usually my stuff we worked on because the dealer screwed it up or we couldn't afford any different . He is in Chicago now and I'm still stuck in swamp east Mo. Just about had both my wife and I teary eyed. He hasn't been home in over 3 years and I guess has no interest in coming home anymore. :{

 

[kboettcher]

DAMM..... had me a bit choked up there with that first post. :{ I'm only 43 years old and have twin boys 13 years old, so I can't really relate to what you are talking about yet but, I am the son in your story. I can still remember dad giving me and my brother heck for leaving the tools lying around ... or loosing the odd one, leaving it out in the bush at the tree house or fort till it was all rusty. I still think all those smacks upside the head must have helped me learn something, I usually put my tools away when I am done now. And who knows maybe he will come back someday. My dad has retired from his grounds foreman job at the local school district at the age of 65. He has now started his own company and now builds sports fields to help put his second family through college. I work with him now when he needs a hand, I just book off on holidays and help him out. I really enjoy working with him and we get along good most of the time. Whats even better is when he comes to me and asks me for advice or how we should do something. I can only hope that my boys and I get along as good as my brother and I do with our dad. I'm sure they will, they are great kids. Sorry about this... . looks like I got a little carried away. I better leave room for someone else to post. Thanks for the wakeup EZGZ.