They are definitely bigger, both dimensionally and weight. Aside from what you mentioned there is also the PTO. They account for a lot of mass.
I think you are largely still missing the point i am trying to make. I didn't chime in to try and justify what "I" bought. In fact it has nothing to do with the 68rfe and everything to do with the Aisin, the one that so many have commented on asking "is this right?" And it isn't just new guys either. There is a very respectable member who i wont name that has had probably more experience with MD stuff than most here. He has had his in to get looked at for these very issues. At one point he wrote "I've simply learned to ignore it".That's not right, not normal, and not characteristic of any properly tuned automatic transmission regardless of rating. I'm sorry, but it just isn't.
And he isn't alone. Another long time member that changes trucks like some guys I work with change underwear sold his Aisin truck for a 68 because the shifts drove him nuts. There's definitely something more than just explaining away, "it's a real trans".
Maybe it's just Ram and Aisin not working together to get the tuning right. It seems hit and miss with some owners having a finnicky unit and others not. The bad thing is, nobody even knows what else these transmissions are run in So there's nothing else to even compare to. That's another head scratcher. Eaton, ZF, and Allison have their units available across multiple truck manufacturers and are very modular in the aspect they can be upfitted to multiple platforms.