Animal-Rights Activists Release 71,000 Cows Into Wild

[Doc Tinker]

http://www.theonion.com/onion3420/animal_rights.html

 

[Archive]

Doc... I can not even believe this! It has to be the most stupid thing I have ever read. Run with the bears? For about 30 seconds, til the bear has a nice fat lunch! A bear can outrun a quarterhorse the first 100 yds.

Those cows don't stand a chance surviving in the woods, nor would these idiots that did it... hmmm, I just got an idea. For "rustling" these cows, drop this group off in the middle of the Bob Marshall Wilderness. If they make it out, they can go free. If they don't, the world will be better off!

 

[Fireman Dave]

LMAO! #ad


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2001 2500; SLT; 4x4; QC; LWB; Auto; 3. 54 LS; 265s; Camper; Tow; Sliding Rear Window; Travel Convenience Group; Cab Clearance Lamps; BedRug; Forest Green

 

[merryman]

That give new meaning to the expression ,"complete idiot".

And too stupid to realize they commited a great cruelty to the cows.

Vaughn

 

[Jff24Gordn]

BTW, cows are not natural to America. They were native in the eastern hemisphere. They had to be shipped here. So why would you release them here??


BTW The onion is a BS paper.

 

[HEMI®Dart]

I can't believe that.

Most of them will probably die.

 

[illflem]

Don't you guys get it, nothing the Onion says is true, it's for humor.
" Monday's cow release is the highest-profile raid for the Animal Liberation Front since October 1996, when the group released three million chickens into Yosemite National Park. "

 

[Fireman Dave]

I wondered how long it would take someone to reveal what the Onion is all about. #ad
Their roots are from the University of Wisconsin. Their radio spots are hilarious.

 

[Champane Flight]

These folks are a riot. PBS had a special about them just last week. They did start their publication in the mid-west. They just moved to New York. No guys it is satire at its finest. No one is sacred to these folks.

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95 Dodge 2500 Luverne grill guard,headache rack,running boards and Amzoiled. Soon to be mildly bombed. 84 Dodge d-150, 318 Hooker headers,Edelbrok intake,mallory ignition,Carter Afb,Accel coil,and Custom dual exhaust. Boat,fifthwheel,motorcycles,and shop. 72000 as of 3/1/01,not even broke in yet. Old Dodge 126000 miles and running better than new.

 

[Iceman1]

Doc, that was a good one. Had me going fer a bit. How many trucks would it take to move 71,000 head... a short distance...

 

[Doc Tinker]

Dammit! Can't a guy have some fun around here? You guys could have waited to reveal that it's just a cowpie story! #ad


Doc

 

[Doc Tinker]

This one's for real...

A Dutch veterinarian was fined 600 guilders (about $240) for causing a fire that destroyed a farm in Lichten Vourde, the Netherlands. The vet had been trying to convince a farmer that his cow was passing flatulent gas; to demonstrate, the vet ignited the gas, but the cow became a "four-legged flame-thrower" and ran wild, setting fire to bales of hay.
Damage to the farm was assessed at $80,000. The cow was unharmed. AP (contributed by Henry Allen)

 

[Sled Puller]

Doc,
I'll send that link to my Dad, he will go BERSERK!!

He flat out hates treehuggin, animal rights liberal loosers!
I'll let you know if it gets him going!!

 

[MATT MAN]

First Mad Cow, now this!!!
Looks like it's a bad time to be a cow #ad

 

['956Wheel]

Originally posted by Doc Tinker:
This one's for real...

A Dutch veterinarian was fined 600 guilders (about $240) for causing a fire that destroyed a farm in Lichten Vourde, the Netherlands. The vet had been trying to convince a farmer that his cow was passing flatulent gas; to demonstrate, the vet ignited the gas, but the cow became a "four-legged flame-thrower" and ran wild, setting fire to bales of hay.
Damage to the farm was assessed at $80,000. The cow was unharmed. AP (contributed by Henry Allen)

Hold it Doc, that wasn't a cow, that was George from work! I knew that guy would make the news someday!



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