Here I am

Best Sob Story (Ends May 31, 2011)

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TDRadmin

Staff Member
OK, check your 2011 TDR Member calendar, and you will see that the folks at Geno's Garage are offering 10% off any MBRP exhaust system they stock during May.



A few of you may not have the money for a new exhaust system, but I'd bet you DO have a really great sob story.



So post why YOU should be given a free MBRP exhaust system.



That's it. Make it good. Make it believeable. Pictures would earn you extra points! Especially if they make us laugh! But they are not required.



Winner gets a MBRP exhaust sytem (unit must be stocked by Geno's Garage) or $300 gift certificate if they do not have a MBRP exhast system for your truck.



Two runners up will be selected to receive an MBRP exhaust tip.



OK, sharpen up your pencils and wit.



Good luck!



Robin

TDR Admin
 
A few years back, on one of my cross-country jaunts, I was driving along in my truck reminiscing about girls and cars from my past and my eyes started tearing up. Then the Cummins started bucking and missing. Emotional bonding? Can't be. I know we've been through a lot together over the years, but come on. A few miles later it all cleared up. Turns out I'd driven past a very large onion farm.

Last week, after a particularly rotten day at work, I stopped at Kroger to pick up some comfort food. Walking out through the parking lot, I saw my truck completely engulfed in flames and I burst into tears, remembering the good times we'd had travelling around the country. Getting closer, I realized it was a gasser and my truck was nine spaces farther down. Suddenly I felt a whole better. But I kept the comfort food anyway; it was still a lousy day.
 
Demise of my '03 QCLB 3500 4x4 RIP

March 16th of this year I got off work to go see my new born grandson whowas born 1 month premature and still in the neonatal unit at the hospital.

So I went by sons house to ride over with him. Went to the hospital, saw my grandson, he looked great.

Went back to my sons house to come home. Got a call from my wife to pick up he old 4 poster bed that the kids weren't using anymore. Put it in the back of the truck and headed home.

Got about 3 miles from my sons house at a 4 way stop. Did what I was supposed to do, stopped and looked started through the intersection, happened to glance to the right just as another truck is about 3 feet away from me.

Well, hit hit me square in the doors (QCLB) doing what turned out to an estimated 60 mph, he never even touched the brakes.

Luckily, myself, him, his passenger and 18 month old (Thank God in a baby seat in the back) were able to walk away without the need for and ambulance.

Hit me hard enough on the passenger side to push the cab off the mounts until he and the cab hit the frame rail, then bent the frame another 18".

I slid about 20' sideways after he hit me ending up in someones yard on the other side of the intersection.

Worst 3 things about this:

1) my 1st thought after he hit me, there goes my goal of hitting 750K miles in this truck. So I'm ******

2) The bed that my wife had been after me to pick up for a month was now kindling in some guys front yard, So she's ****** and

3) the biggest blow of all the !@#$%^& that hit me was driving a !@#$$%^& FORD. Every Ram owner shoud be ******

Does it get any worse.

Lost my truck, ****** off my wife, taken out by a FORD?!!!

Oh well!

By the way this story is true word for word.

I couldn't dream this !@#$ up! #@$%!

Bob
 
Am I to believe that the Dodge/Cummins platform is such a good combination that no one has any good, but sad, stories? Like:
  • "Waaa! My truck broke! The GCW was only 35,000#!"
  • "OMG! You ain't gonna believe dis! (Hold my beer. ) Dere I was, mindtin' my own bidness, when the wheel fell off my truck!"
  • "Aaaaaahhh! I windowed my block street racing a Powerstroke!"
  • "After all my BOMBs, a bone-stock Duramax beat me!"

Or will Ms. Robin have the only winning story? "Sob, sniff. I came up with a great contest. But nobody played!"
 
sob story

Am I to believe that the Dodge/Cummins platform is such a good combination that no one has any good, but sad, stories? Like:

  • "Waaa! My truck broke! The GCW was only 35,000#!"
  • "OMG! You ain't gonna believe dis! (Hold my beer. ) Dere I was, mindtin' my own bidness, when the wheel fell off my truck!"
  • "Aaaaaahhh! I windowed my block street racing a Powerstroke!"
  • "After all my BOMBs, a bone-stock Duramax beat me!"



Or will Ms. Robin have the only winning story? "Sob, sniff. I came up with a great contest. But nobody played!"



I hear ya!

You sent in your Sob story (good one too!), I sent in mine and then NOTHIN'

I was beginiing to think the site was broke!

At least now we (you/me) know that we can submit to this thread!

Maybe we should volunteer our services to forward stories seeins' nobody elses' computer will connect to this thread.



Everyone have a good weekend and remember those who serve US/our country :) and those in the path of the Mississippi!!! :mad:

Bob
 
This is a true story albeit not that great of sob story more of bad day.



We have some property down in the sw corner of the state that has pinyon pines on it that have been decimated by beetle kill. It is about 375 miles from our house. I have cut down at least 3000 trees and am far from done. I have dealt with the slash and given free firewood to everyone I know and even some I don't know. It is a lot of work so I thought hey why not rent a big wood chipper and see how it goes. I figured it should save a lot of work, fuel and time as I do this by myself.



So I drive down rent the 12 inch 110hp Cummins diesel powered chipper that evening. Next morning I get to the property drive in the two track on frozen ground (it is mid March). Go about my business everything is going ok but the chipper seems not to cut so well. I got a bit irked as they told me they just sharpened the cutter teeth. The rental place is too far away to just take it back and ask what the heck. So I break out the tools and remove the chipping wheel cover. And to my surprise find about 100 feet of barbed wire wrapped around the cutter head. Now I am really irked as there is no barb wire on our place and I think I would have noticed 100 feet of it whipping around as it spooled on to the cutter head, so much for just sharpening the cutter head teeth. In any case again they are too far away to just take it back as I will not get any chipping done in the time I have before I have to get home. So I get to getting the wire out of it. It took me an hour or so as it was wound very tight on the head. I literally ended up with a pair of snips cutting it off little bit by little bit. Get it all back together and it is working beautifully. I am now rockin' and despite the setback am happy how it is going.



I have to have the chipper back by close that day so I quit at 3pm which should get me back to the rental place before close. As you can imagine a 12inch chipper is not a small machine and weighs in the neighborhood of 5500lbs and is about 17 ft long. So I go to leave the property and immediately realize that I drove in on frozen ground but now it has thawed and is very slick but aside from slick am moving ok. I get to a point on the two track that I have to make a left turn to get up on the road. There is a tree on the right side of the two track at that point so I figure I don't want the trailer to slide in the mud and hit the tree and rip off a fender so I slow down to make the turn. Truck gets by the tree fine and the trailer is mostly past it. However since I slowed down as soon as I accelerate slowly my tires spin and I am immediately sunk down to the truck frame. I get out survey the situation I realize at this point that this 20 foot stretch is where all the water from the road drains through so the ground is saturated with water and now since it is thawed it is just a mudbog. Try shifting to 4 low and it is a no go.



So I decided to walk a mile to the nearest neighbor who I find working on a shed not far up their driveway. I holler at her from the road to make my presence known and to essentially get permission to enter the property. The woman says come on over. So as soon as I step on to their property a couple dogs come running up and one of the furry canines bites me right on the knee. Holes in my pants and blood trickling down my shin I can't freaking believe it. The lady says nothing as she sat there and watched it. Well instead of kicking the dog and ripping her a new one I let it go as I need to use her phone. She lets me use her phone to call a wrecker.



I am only about 20 feet off the road I tell the company. They will be there shortly I am told. After about an hour I call back and ask what does shortly mean since they hadn't shown up yet. Got some story about an IRS audit etc but he is on his way. He then shows up in a big Isuzu wrecker sees what is up and says I will have you out of there in 5 minutes. I am skeptical but hey he is the professional. Well 60 minutes later I am out. However that 60 minutes was amusing. First he hooks up as he stays on the road and tries to winch me up. All it did was pull the front end of his truck up off the ground a few feet and didn't budge the dodge in the least. He tries that a couple times. Then he decided to lower a large bar across the back of his truck to the ground. Well that kept his truck front end on the ground but it just dragged his truck backwards and tore up the road by putting some big deep gouges in the dirt road. He tries that a few times to no avail. Then he repositions the truck about 75 feet further away. Goes through the same process his front end up in the air, lowers the bar, tears up the road as he is being dragged backwards. I told him the front of my truck was pretty heavy and that the front wheels were essentially at the edge of this mudbog. Since it was muddy the tires could not get up that one foot or so mud to dirt curb. I suggested again that he raise the boom so that he would lift the front of my truck as the winch pulled it forward and that would get it up over and out of the hole it was in instead of pulling it straight through. Well he finally did it and it popped right out. He was really cool about it said since he was late and that it took so long he wasn't going to charge me. I said no problem, thanks and still gave him 50 bucks. Told him keep it as a tip or give it to the company whatever but somebody deserves something for getting me out. He goes on his merry way. I now bust out the shovel and fix the road damage from the wrecker.



Well the chipper is somewhat muddy from the initial stuck so on the way back to the rental place I pull in to a car wash and wash it off as they charge a hefty fee to clean dirty equipment. Obviously by now I am not going to make it back by closing time but I have to be to work the following day so I head to the rental place anyway hoping to make it. Well they were closed but someone was still there so he let me return it. He wanted to charge me a late fee which is a second day rental. I told him about the barb wire incident and that it wasn't my bard wire. He proceeds to rip on me for working on their equipment and that I should have just brought it back. I explained the economics of it to him about all my time would have been wasted driving back and forth and that I would have cancelled the rental and would not have paid a cent for it at that point. And that since I lost a couple hours cleaning out the wire they should waive the late fee and be happy they got a day rental instead of nothing at all and I saved them a couple hours labor cleaning it out for them. He finally relented probably just to get me out of there so he could go home.



Now I am on my way home going over Wolf Creek Pass and hit blizzard conditions on it. I followed a plow up to the top of the pass and at times could barely see him. Wouldn't you know at the top of the pass he turns around to go back down the same side. I can't see 20 feet the road is not plowe, is well past dark thirty and still need to get down the east side of the pass. Fortunately I know the road well but it was still very scary 10-15mph white knuckle traveling due to visibility. It took a good 45-60 minutes to get down the east side of the pass. However the snow has relented by the time I get to South Fork so back to moving right along. I get about 100 miles over by Sand Dunes National Park and now I have a flat tire. First flat tie I have had in over 20 years. By now it is fairly late so there is no traffic on the highway. My flashlight batteries die partway through the process to add to the joy of changing a tire in the dark. Get rolling along again and hit the freeway to head north after about 10 miles there is a car driving down the wrong side of the freeway (on my side) apparently oblivious of me flashing my lights etc. I give the state patrol a call to inform them of the menace. After about another 50 miles or so the darn freeway is closed due to a major accident. There are only a few cars waiting as it is very late by now but no way to get around it due to the terrain so have to wait 45 minutes.

Once again get rolling and finally get home about 3am. Just in time to go to sleep for an hour and get up and go to work.



That was not one of my better days.
 
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Did you hear about the two antennas getting married? The wedding was kinda boring but the reception was great!



How do you make a tissue dance?

You put a little boogie in it!



Why do chicken coops have 2 doors?

Cause if they had 4 they would be a chicken sedan



What's green and fluffy?

Green fluff.



What did the mother buffalo say to her child as he left for school?

Bison!



Why do cowboys ride horses?

Because they are too heavy to carry.



My family says my truck needs a louder exaust so they can't hear my bad jokes anymore! :-laf Honestly, they weren't that bad. Were they?
 
... My family says my truck needs a louder exaust so they can't hear my bad jokes anymore! :-laf Honestly, they weren't that bad. Were they?



  1. Are you sleeping in the shed?
  2. Have they torched your truck?
  3. Do they starch your shorts?
  4. Do they salt your coffee?
  5. Do they bend, fold, spindle and mutilate your copy of TDR before you get to read it?
  6. Do they short-sheet your bed?
  7. Do they remove the valve cores from your tires?



If none of the above, then your jokes aren't that bad. If all of the above, then you've got nearly the perfect slapstick sob story.
 
All right, here's the sob story (really it's just idle whining at this point) on how I acquired my big Dodge.

Few years ago I had a '99 Dakota that had been paid off for about 18 months with about 147k miles on it. Ran fine, but I was getting a little tired of the fuel bill every week. Decided I needed to keep a truck but needed better mileage, a 2500 Cummins powered Dodge fit that bill, plus I could haul anything I'd ever need to. As luck would have it my brother-in-law(BIL) had a nice old '98 Dodge with the 24V and he really wanted to down-size. his was an automatic truck, but I figured if the price was right I'd be ok with it. Told him I thought my truck was worth about $5k and thought his was worth about $12k (4x4, quad cab, 167k miles, decent shape, showing the miles but not worn out). He said that sounded good and I bit down.

Now, I had heard the stories of him roasting the transmission once, then following that up a second time due to a failed pump, but all seemed to be ok for now. 2 weeks before we're going to trade trucks he calls to tell me he bumped someone in their rear and bent the front bumper a tad didn't ruing anything else. I figured a little bump on the nose wasn't any big deal. Then just as we're getting to town and ready to trade he tells me, well the transmission started slipping again. Great. Well, tried to limp it to my dad's shop to see what was wrong, ended up having to get it towed in. Other issues I already knew on the truck and had planned for Dad's shop to fix: heater core was bad and tires were worn out plus they were only c-load range tires. Now we had to add transmission work to the bill. The tech flushed it out and changed the filter, had all its gears anyway and seemed to be ok so I had them start on the tires and heater core so I could take my new truck home.

Work got completed and we headed out of town, I was happy. Got 30 miles down the road, pulled over to check something in the bed and when I took off there was a sickening bang followed by no movement of the vehicle. Called a wrecker to get towed back to the shop and found that the transmission just gave up again. We had borrowed a car to get back home while Dad's shop worked on the truck. At this point I started looking at options. BIL was willing to take it back to the same guy who rebuilt this transmission twice, but I didn't trust that too much since it failed twice now, plus the truck had to come 500 miles to get to me, I asked if the guy might guarantee his work for say 90 days or something. BIL said that would be unfair. Dad could get a Dodge reman for a decent price but turns out the cooling circuit had been jacked on an earlier job and Dodge would require the coolant tank and proper air cooler hooked back up to give their 60k mile warranty on the transmission.

At this point I was already in for the tires and heater core and since BIL wanted to jack me around with garage work on the transmission I offered to unwind our deal and I'd give him the tires and heater core (my lesson for a bad deal) and he could just give me that running Dakota back. Answer was that he couldn't afford to do that because of the payments on the diesel truck. I was stuck, so I just bit down hard and had the proper transmission job with a warranty done. Cost more than I wanted in the truck but now a number of years later I came out ok, the truck still runs like a champ and it's been paid off for a long time plus this truck is worth more than that Dakota would be by now and I'm getting much better fuel mileage. In the end I won (word on the street was that BIL ended up with that Dakota getting re-po'd), but it sure was a rocky start out of the gate.

So, now I've owned the truck a few years and just a year or so ago the exhaust pipe after the muffler rusted out. Had to remove that section of pipe and haven't decided what would be best as a replacement. A shiny new MBRP unit would definitely be awesome!
 
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NEVER do business (especially involving $) with family, blood or otherwise.

You know what they say about keeping it in the family and all!

Glad it worked out for you.
 
Here is a sob story. I purchased an 02 brand new and planned on keeping the truck FOREVER. After the first 1200 miles, a lady missed a stop sign in town and smashed the lights, fender, bumper and hood. Plus alignment was way off. Her insurance put it back together but has not the same.
 
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A few months later another lady driving a small honda car could not make a snowy curve while we were both at about 45mph. I turned hard towards the ditch but not in time. My left rear tire blew out her windshield as she slid under me. The crash set of her air bags. Somehow when she shot underneath me it did not flip me over, thank god. Her insurance put the truck back together but it REALLY was not the same. I sold the truck and never looked back figuring that the next crash in that truck would kill me.
 
So here is the SOB part, all this left me without the truck of my dreams and in the last 10 years since I have had a 5 dodge diesel trucks but non that were like that new truck was when I got it fresh of the delivery truck. I cannot bring myself to own anything but 00-02 diesel trucks as a result of my anguish and trauma from the 2 crashes in less than 6 months. Kinda like mallard ducks that mate for life. I have seen one of the duck partners hit by a car and the other duck is standing in traffic next to its mate because that is what its instincts tell it to do. I have lost my sole mate... ... ... .
:{ :-laf :{

Dave
 
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  1. Are you sleeping in the shed?
  2. Have they torched your truck?
  3. Do they starch your shorts?
  4. Do they salt your coffee?
  5. Do they bend, fold, spindle and mutilate your copy of TDR before you get to read it?
  6. Do they short-sheet your bed?
  7. Do they remove the valve cores from your tires?



If none of the above, then your jokes aren't that bad. If all of the above, then you've got nearly the perfect slapstick sob story.



Now that you mention it, it does explain a lot!
 
Zooming along, until...

On the way to work on the freeway. Speed limit is 65mph and the mighty Cummins is singing, and the turbo is whistling and I'm whistling in tune to the turbo. The Cummins is in it's happy place and is pulling effortlessly and wants to go, go, go. The windows are down, the air is sweet, and I marvel at the music of the wind and the engine. A man and his truck. Such joy.

SCRRRRREEEEEEECH. Now wait a cotton picken minute. Both lanes have slowed down to 55, and in the right lane is a truck wearing all sorts of emblems signifying toxic cargo. And parked right next to it is a green Toyota matching the speed of the toxic carrier. No one is front of either. This parade goes on for the next four miles or so, until finally the toxic truck takes an exit, and the ten or so cars behind the green Toyota pass it on the right.

Finally my turn comes to go around and I look over to see a mysterious figure hunched behind the wheel wearing sunglasses, and a painter's white paper filter mask with a yellow plastic valve thingy on the nose.

I swear to God it was <s>Elvis</s> Osama Bin Laden. Who else would be so bold as to camp in the passing lane?
 
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