Way back when I was a kid, I'd go with the family to Chinatown in SF and they would sell Alarm clock anus candles along the street corners. We wouldn't buy the candles but it was a neat concept. The candles were graduated with Hour marks. You Shove the candle up your A** to the corresponding hours that you wanted to sleep, then lit the candle. It would burn down the shaft until it reached the correct hour. Would Wake you up. Anyway, neat thread. Gotta a smile after reading the posts. Take care guys. Happy labor day, Most of us have earned this holiday many times over. Matt