Loved the story!!
I too raised hay on the side while working (after we gave up on getting rich raising horses)
I always figured I was the only guy who hated grease guns; I even acquired an air powered set up that mounts on top a 35 pound (size of a 5 gallon) bucket of grease. Yup, that thing hates me too, but you can make a bigger mess faster :>).
I still have and use it on the JD back hoe and its a rare grease job that does not involve a fair amount of cussin!
I have learned to never start to grease the "hoe" if the grandkids are around or I end up in deep do do with the spouse.
Vaughn