Houston may have a slight obesity issue. We're fat, all right? It does get a little humid around here in summer. Our beaches don't look like Waikiki. Quite possibly cars are backed up on I-10 between Bingle and Wirt and it's 2 p. m. — why in heaven's name is there traffic? Our sports teams haven't won a championship in forever.
And, especially during rodeo time, our city does look like a Village People convention.
Yeah, we're an easy target. When a major event is held in Houston, and the nation's media pour in, they will crank out stories about what a mess our city is.
Hey, I love Houston, I live here, and I think it's a mess, too.
But when it hits the fan, and somebody you love is wounded or gravely ill, or your city is flooded and there's nowhere to turn …
You come to Houston.
U. S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords is coming to Houston from Arizona to continue her miraculous recovery from an assassin's bullet through her brain.
She is coming to Houston because here is where we take the impossible and make it better.
There will be a traffic tie-up of TV satellite trucks and hundreds of reporters around the Med Center. It's going to be a mess down there. You might want to take Richmond instead of Bissonnet. There will be news conferences and thousands of stories reading "Dateline: Houston. "
Please, no fat jokes. When the media reports on Giffords' recovery, try to resist putting an ugly political spin on the shootings in Tucson. Hey, I'm part of the media, and I was repulsed by commentators using murder to gain votes or notoriety or whatever cruel goal they had.
Talk about The Institute for Rehabilitation and Research Memorial Hermann, where Rep. Giffords will fight to walk again and think again and lead again. Where she hopes to help raise her stepdaughters again. Talk about the Texas Medical Center, where world political figures who give the U. S. a hard time send their children to be healed. And we treat them and send them back home healthy. And we don't ask for political favors in exchange.
Write about Texas Children's Hospital, where a little boy who lives down the street from me was cured of cancer. Where my own son had a operation when he was 8 months old, and I had to sign a paper giving the doctor permission to remove his kidney, but he left that hospital fine, with both of his kidneys. In fact, these doctors are so good, I think they might have put a spare kidney in him.
Now 13 years later, if only Texas Children's could perform an operation that would make him put his socks in the hamper.
Giffords may be in Houston for weeks and months. Her rehabilitation will take time. And as the weeks go by, there will be less media attention on Houston. You'll get bored. Maybe your editors will say, "While you're down there, write a color story about Houston. "
Go to the Rodeo - KISS is playing there March 14. Eat some barbecue. The Rockets are playing at Toyota Center. Good seats are available.
OK, you can do a few fat jokes. But remember, there's a congresswoman who will be down on Fannin getting her life back. She is our inspiration.
Giffords is coming to Houston.