Attention: TDR Forum Junkies 
Some one posted this in the comedy section on www.bustropolis.com and I had to share.
For everyone who has ever had an evaluation - just remember, it
could have been worse. These are actual quotes taken from Federal
Government employee performance evaluations.
1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom and
has started to dig. "
2. "I would not allow this employee to Breed. "
3. "This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a
definite won't be. "
4. "Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a
rat in a trap. "
5. "When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet. "
7. "This young lady has delusions of adequacy. "
8. "He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to
achieve them. "
9. "This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. "
10. "This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better. "
11. "Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together. "
12. "A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus. "
13. "He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier. "
14. "I would like to go hunting with him sometime. "
15. "He's been working with glue too much. "
16. "He would argue with a signpost. "
17. "He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room. "
18. "When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell. "
19. "If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other
one. "
20. "A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on. "
21. "A prime candidate for natural de-selection. "
22. "Donated his brain to science before he was done using it. "
23. "Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming. "
24. "He's got two brains cells, one is lost and the other is out looking
for it. "
25. "If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week. "
26. "If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change. "
27. "If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean. "
28. "It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm. "
29. "One neuron short of a synapse. "
30. "Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled. "
31. "Takes him 2 hours to watch '60-minutes'. "
32. "The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead. "
For everyone who has ever had an evaluation - just remember, it
could have been worse. These are actual quotes taken from Federal
Government employee performance evaluations.
1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom and
has started to dig. "
2. "I would not allow this employee to Breed. "
3. "This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a
definite won't be. "
4. "Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a
rat in a trap. "
5. "When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet. "
7. "This young lady has delusions of adequacy. "
8. "He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to
achieve them. "
9. "This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. "
10. "This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better. "
11. "Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together. "
12. "A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus. "
13. "He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier. "
14. "I would like to go hunting with him sometime. "
15. "He's been working with glue too much. "
16. "He would argue with a signpost. "
17. "He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room. "
18. "When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell. "
19. "If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other
one. "
20. "A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on. "
21. "A prime candidate for natural de-selection. "
22. "Donated his brain to science before he was done using it. "
23. "Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming. "
24. "He's got two brains cells, one is lost and the other is out looking
for it. "
25. "If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week. "
26. "If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change. "
27. "If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean. "
28. "It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm. "
29. "One neuron short of a synapse. "
30. "Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled. "
31. "Takes him 2 hours to watch '60-minutes'. "
32. "The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead. "
:-laf
