This is an interesting read. We always ate supper together when the kids were younger - we miss some nights now due to running one child to one place and another child to another place. As my boys are now into early teenage years we have had to make a rule that the first thing we do at the table is say what we did and how our day went - gets us past the teenage one word answers and them into sayiong something.
I agree with the observation abiove that there is less of an effort to have family time and together time. I'd also say, IMHO, that us men type of folks are by far the most to blame. My sons go/went to a private Catholic school and so I know my observations are not the average - but, even at that I would say half of the kids are in homes with no father. It amazes me how many of the children that my kids go to school with come from unmarried/divorced/sparated etc. , homes. In most cases it is pretty well tied into the fact that the man involved is irresponsible. This is not true in every case, but it seems to me that men have really fallen down on the job in leading the family.
Being a parent is hard work. My thirteen year old was having a fit because he doesn't want to do his homework. So I tell the boy that life is filled with stuff you don't want to do, but you need to do your best at it regardless, you don't whine about it, you get your rear-end in gear and focus and get it done, and you do your best. When he continues to have a fit and says I don't care about doing my best, I says fine - but, you are going to sit down at the table, open that book, and do your best because I am your father and I'm telling you that you are going to do your best. So the fit continues and he tells me how much he hates me, blah blah blah. I say I couldn't care less how you feel about me, I love you too much to let you grow up to be lazy and irresponsible, so sit down and get to it before I sit you down. Now, I would sure rather stop at the pub after work and have a beer and wings and watch the game instead of going home and dealing with a that nonsense - or maybe just go out to the garage and let my wife deal with it - who wouldn't? But, we are back to that whole thing about being a responsible person and a parent. I think way too many men are skipping right to the wings and beer and forgetting about their responsibilities or letting their wives deal with things alone.
As far as abbreviations - there are far more diagnoses than in earlier decades, and far more prescriptions. I don't know whether things have really changed or we seek ways for parents to avoid having to deal with situations. My fifteen year old is an ADHD diagnosis, and he has a prescription. We have worked with him for a long time, and continue to. He is in 9th grade this year; he has left the private Catholic school and goes to a competitive-entry public school -it is supposed to be the #2 public high school in our state. He has done very well at school and is getting good grades; he is running cross country and has improved all year. Yet he remains extremely challenged socially - he does not know how to relate to people and does not have any friends beyond superficial acquaintance - he really has no friends - can you imagine for a fifteen year old boy? Some acronyms are real.
I think kids are like trees - it takes thirty or forty years to see what you are really going to get.
I guess I have rambled on here - but, to Axtell3 - I know what you are going through - you can see that I do. Keep on keeping on - it is what we do as responsible parents. It is great that you are keeping on with your daughter - we have worked endlessly with my fifteen year old and we are getting results academically. His social skills aremain a great challenge - so we keep on keeping on. Best wishes and my hopes and prayers to you.