Attention: TDR Forum Junkies 
This is from Brent Olson also, couldn't find a link. This the last half (the best part) of the story... .....
..... It gets worse. Not only has the snow melted off the lawn, but our tom cat has noticed the warmth of the spring sun and has been reborn.
You know the line in that poem that goes something like: "It's spring and a young man's fancy turns to thoughts of love. " Well, I'm pretty sure it isn't exactly love that's on the tomcat's mind, but whatever it is, it ain't pretty. Maybe he wouldn't be such an unappealing sight if he weren't already ugly and dissipated looking. If he were a person he'd be Jack Nickolson after 3 days without sleep and no access to either mirrors or combs. Of course Jack appears to have his teeth and both his ears, and not even Jack would leave his tail knotted up with cockleburs.
The whole feline courting process is made even worse by the low quality of the rest of the cats. Through careful selective breeding, we have managed to develop a group of cats whose collective IQ now approches negative numbers.
I'm serius- these animals are dumb even by cat standards. One of them welcomes my wife home by walking over and sitting in the middle of the garage floor as the car approaches. More than once we've parked the car and afew moments later watched the cat stroll out from underneath, mildly puzzled as to why it suddenly got dark. I've seen zucchinis with more highly developed survival mechanisms. I'm convinced if we stopped feeding them there would soon be nothing left but cat skeletons sittng in a circle around the empty food dish.
I think that explains the vaguely disgusted look on our tomcat's face. He's toold to wander off in search of more promising intellectual company, but he knows how near the bottom of the barrel he's gone.
Springtime on the praire. If you didn't give points for potential, it'd be hard to get out of bed in the morning.
..... It gets worse. Not only has the snow melted off the lawn, but our tom cat has noticed the warmth of the spring sun and has been reborn.
You know the line in that poem that goes something like: "It's spring and a young man's fancy turns to thoughts of love. " Well, I'm pretty sure it isn't exactly love that's on the tomcat's mind, but whatever it is, it ain't pretty. Maybe he wouldn't be such an unappealing sight if he weren't already ugly and dissipated looking. If he were a person he'd be Jack Nickolson after 3 days without sleep and no access to either mirrors or combs. Of course Jack appears to have his teeth and both his ears, and not even Jack would leave his tail knotted up with cockleburs.
The whole feline courting process is made even worse by the low quality of the rest of the cats. Through careful selective breeding, we have managed to develop a group of cats whose collective IQ now approches negative numbers.
I'm serius- these animals are dumb even by cat standards. One of them welcomes my wife home by walking over and sitting in the middle of the garage floor as the car approaches. More than once we've parked the car and afew moments later watched the cat stroll out from underneath, mildly puzzled as to why it suddenly got dark. I've seen zucchinis with more highly developed survival mechanisms. I'm convinced if we stopped feeding them there would soon be nothing left but cat skeletons sittng in a circle around the empty food dish.
I think that explains the vaguely disgusted look on our tomcat's face. He's toold to wander off in search of more promising intellectual company, but he knows how near the bottom of the barrel he's gone.
Springtime on the praire. If you didn't give points for potential, it'd be hard to get out of bed in the morning.
Maybe someday. 
