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The best joke I ever played on someone was...

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Rod Ends/Heim Joints

Getting My Eyeballs "Bombed"

I will tell one of the good ones.



I was working as a mechanic at a smaller shop just out of high school. I came out of work one night and got in my truck, it was a 76 power wagon with a BB 400. I fired it up, got some oil pressure and put it in second and let the clutch out. Nothing happened, I took it out of gear and put it back in, nothing. I tried 3rd, 4th and reverse, still nothing. I checked to make sure the transfer case was in gear, even 4 low got nothing. I get out and look under and something was not right but it did not hit me looking under it in the dark. I happened to look in the bed and there are BOTH of my drivelines, U-joints taped, with a bag with bolts. I was livid, my buddy that I worked with got off a couple hours earlier than me and he had gotten me good. I unlocked the shop to get some tools and put it back together. I waited about a week without saying a word until he was working late and I was not. He had a 71 Chevy, points ignition and the key in the dash. I took a wire and ran it from the housing of the ignition switch through the dash to the coil wire, stripped it back about an inch and stuck it in the coil before ramming the coil wire back in. This guy had a habit of starting his truck and immediately revving it up a couple of times. He got out late, turned the key and it would not start but it sure gave him a wakeup!!! I was hoping it would have started and he had gotten it to rev!

The next day at work he was MAD! I nearly wet my pants listening to him tell me about it. He said it shocked him so he let off the key, but had no idea what was going on so he tried it again!!! There were several rounds before this with messing with each others trucks, but it never happened again!



Young and dumb was fun, and we lived to tell about it!!
 
Don't know if it was my best one but at least I remember it since it was last week. My dog drug home a four point buck road kill. After he disconnected the head I snuck up under a lab window at work with several people working in it and tapped on the window with the head. Needless to say it woke everybody up that morning.
 
I tied twenty empty antifreeze jugs together on a long rope and attached it to a co-workers rear bumper. She drove all the way home, wondering what the noise was and wondering why she was getting strange looks from everyone.







Doc
 
Another time, I took a pair of coveralls and stuffed them with old rags and tied it to the rear bumper of another co-worker's car. He left work dragging a body down the expressway and people were trying to get him to pull over.



Doc
 
Several years ago, two of the guys I street rod with hit deer with their trucks. One was on his way to the F100 Supernationals in Pigeon Forge TN. We bought a "Nothing runs like a Deere" license plate and attached it to his truck one night. Well that got a chuckle but there had to be more. I asked my dad if he would look around for a cheap deer head mount at garage sales. He found a $5 beauty!



Next Supernationals the plan was somewhat foiled by the fact that victim #1 did not bring his truck, but #2 did. While he was away from his truck, we lovingly set the head mount against the drivers seat. Fortunantly, it was the proper height and was even looking to its left.



He found it several hours later after several thousand other people had, including "Video Bob" who did the coverage of the event.



I still do not think he has forgiven me... :D :D
 
A co-worker placed a half rotten jack-o-lantern on my hood once, so I used a slim-jim to open her car and placed the jack-o-lantern in the driver's seat and removed the dome light fuse. After dark, she jumped into her car and squashed the jack-o-lantern. I don't think she ever got rid of the mess in the uphostery and she never did forgive me for that one :)



Doc
 
One of the school bus drivers told me once that she was scared of snakes. I borrowed a rubber snake from another co-worker and wrapped it arround the steering wheel of her bus one night. In the morning she saw it and freaked out. She took a week off work to get her nerves back in order :D



Doc
 
Some of the bus drivers are pretty jumpy. I would hide in one of the passenger seats of a bus and when the driver arrived to start her bus in the morning, before daylight, I would jump up yelling. They would scream of coarse, and then chase me half way across the parking lot.



Doc
 
We had a soda machine in our break room at work - one day I put in the money for a drink, but didn't activate the switch. I waited until a buddy came into the room, then I casually walked over to the machine, measured up the front a foot or so, and gave it a good THUMP with my fist - then hit the delivery button, and of course, my drink popped out!



My buddy was incredulous, and I just gave him a wink as I walked out slurping down my "free" soda.



All I could hear down the hallway behind me as I walked away, was him frantically banging on the front of the machine and then punching the delivery button... ;) :D
 
jokes

At UPS we always have to do things to break the monotony. No UPS driver ever starts off slow, it's hit the key,dump the clutch. There is a small ledge above the windshield and I set a small cup of water on it. You know the rest.
 
Over the road

Drove for a over the road outfit for about ten years. They had a pretty high turnover rate on drivers. Caught up to a couple of drivers who were teaming up with each other one at a time. Told both of them the other was gay! They drove for three days giving each other the evil eye and not getting any sleep! They were both scared to get in the sleeper!



I thought it was real funny, until they caught up to me... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... I had to talk REAL fast! They did get even. they got ahold of the team list and teamed me up with the worse driver in the outfit. I did'nt get much sleep for a week!
 
One of my roommates in college finally got a date with a gal he had been asking out for awhile. He had a really large cap on a front tooth and he looked just awful when the cap wasn't on the tooth, the cap was loose and he had to be careful not to lose it at meals, etc. He was brushing his teeth the night of the big date, the cap fell out into the sink and down the drain. We couldn't find any tools to remove the sink trap so he got in his car and went to another dorm where he knew a guy that would have some tools. Just after he left, a fella showed up with some tools, we took the sink trap apart, took his cap out and put all the hair and other junk back in the trap and put it back together. Roomie shows up a little later with some tools, frantically takes the sink trap apart, it is getting closer and closer to ttime for the hot date, and you can't believe the words that came out of his mouth when he found all the hair and other crud, but no cap to his tooth. Any way, he wasn't too happy when we finally could not keep a straight face any longer and gave him the cap for his tooth. he knew he had been had.
 
I took a big piece of card board about 3'x4' an taped to the tail gate of a military supervisors truck with the words in bright paint, "I am gay and proud of it"! He drove around all night with that on, he couldn't figure out what everyone was laughing at. The best part of it was that his wife knew of it and just laughed with all the other people in town.
 
Practical jokes

I once rigged the windshield washer hose to spary on the drivers crotch. Got a Administration type royal when servicing his car. This guy is always in a big hurry. Sprayed a fire extinguisher around the shop and dusted his windshield. He comes to pick up his car on his way to a board meeting and while backing out hits the wipers then the washer, he must of hit the washer button a couple of times befor it started to soak through his dress slacks. He got out and his face was RED as a beet, cussing up a blue streak. It looked like he pee'ed his pants, he asked for some paper towels and promptly left. I had to hide under the hood of another vehicle because I was to busy LMAO. Sure enough the next week his car came back in with a squack on the windshield washer. That Friday the rest of the mechanics bought all my rounds in the bar:D :D :D
 
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