The French

[WDaniels]

Heard a good one today. When all of the coalission ships gather around the Persian Gulf to fight Iraq, how will you be able to tell which ones are French? ..... 1... ... 2... ... 3, They are the ones with back up lights.

WD

 

[mimprevento]

French

When finally convinced to send a small unit of Coalition troops- the French dispatch a unit that lands at facilities in Riyadh. One of the Hummers backfires and the entire unit drops its weapons , surrenders and goes home. That is the last allied troops will ever see of the 120th Jerry Lewis Battalion- the famed "Nutty Professors"

 

[The patriot]

ROFLMAO!!!

That's better than the one I heard about the stadium of french surrendering to a busload of german tourists.

OOps, guess that's not PC, theyre allies now.

Eric

 

[JSmith]

My buddy told me he had a like new condition french rifle for sale that was never fired,but was dropped once.

 

[WDaniels]

mimprevento,

ROTFLMAO!!! :-laf :-laf The 120th Jerry Lewis battalion. WD

 

[mimprevento]

French rifles

I actually have an MAS 36 that came wrapped in cosmoline and was never fired- the most ungainly, impractable, slow POS ever to hit the battlefield. Actually the French surrendered before they were introduced and they were mostly used by the Legion or fell into VC hands after Indo-China. This one never got a chance to get dropped but it might as well have been!!!! BTW it has no safety- the French presumed it would never be loaded so why bother!!!

 

[The patriot]

I feel this one needs to be posted again, especially at this time.

Note item #4.

Eric



The United Nations is having a gigantic garage sale to get rid of things they don't use anymore or don't need and make room in their storage areas. This sale will be held in front of the UN building in New York for the next few weekends. Here are some tidbits of what will be offered:



1. ) A copy of UN statements regarding how much better Africa would be if all the "white" colonial farmers would be kicked out and the land redistributed. This is a real bargain at $5. 00



2. ) A definitive collection of UN statements condemning the expulsion of weapons inspectors from Iraq for the last ten years. A steal at $2. 50 and it is signed by Tariq Aziz.



3. ) Boxed CD compilation of recorded Soviet protests of American imperialism. $7. 50



4. ) One-of-a-kind cassette tape of Nikita Kruschev banging his shoe on the table at the UN. The French representative can actually be heard in the background cringing in fear and crying. Only $10, no haggling.



5. ) Another rare recording of Nikita Kruschev banging his shoe on the table over the phone while ordering pizza in New York for the UN General Assembly. Unheard of price at $15



6. ) A written complaint to the UN from Idi Amin regarding unprovoked Israeli attacks on his poor, defenseless soldiers at Entebbe. $1. 25



7. ) A photo of Yassir Arafat banging his combat boot on the table at the UN. $5. 00



8. ) UN-issue weapons from the Bosnian peacekeeping mission. Never used, like new. $15 each. Your choice.



9. ) Various UN resolutions condemning tyranny. $1. 50 for whle grab-bag. For another $1, you get a second grab-bag of various UN resolutions condemning mass murders in Africa.



10. ) "Stalwart Leadership"--- a thesis written by Kofi Annan. . 50 cents OBO



11. ) A FAX to the UN of Saddam Hussein banging his shoe on a FAX machine. $7. 50



12. ) "My Contributions To A Peaceful World"---a half-page thesis by Yassir Arafat to the UN. Written in crayon. . 25 cents



13. ) "Sustainable Cooperative Environmentally Friendly Intentional Empowering Breakfast Cereals"---a 2 year, $2. 5 billion dollar study by UNESCO and WHO. Yours for only $2. 00!



14. ) A video sent to the UN of Osama bin Laden banging his sandal on the table. Additional footage spliced in show reaction of UN General Assembly, including close-up of French representative cowering and surrendering to the VCR.



15. ) UN Peacekeeping Forces blue berets. Sold as coffee mug coasters, five to a set. Only $2. 99 per set.



16. ) FREEBIE!! Free, one gross ton of UN criticisms of the United States! You haul off. Bring own garbage truck. Perfect for fertilizer!



Hurry! These bargains won't last!! Cash only. American dollars, please. No checks.

 

[homeka45]

Cheese eating surrender monkeys Plus don't forget the germans who in a recent poll (57%) felt that Americans were a nation of, get this, warmongers!

 

[Hohn]

Yup, Germans never started a War, now did they??

 

[DHRA]

)(*&^$%)(*#@ Germans! Well, 57% of them! This stuff usually doesn't set me off since I know what kind of reception we have overseas. But, the picture in the paper was Berlin protestors holding signs that say "Bomb Texas, It has Oil too"! I guess we need to teach them ANOTHER lesson!

 

[JSmith]

Don`t **** the Germans off. They might put French diesels in Dodge trucks:-laf :-laf :-laf :-laf

 

[DBuchheit]

French tanks have 6 speed transmissions. 5 gears are reverse and one is forward. The one forward gear is in case they are attacked from behind!

 

[Eric Kahn]

the french build some very good weapons, having never actually learned how to use them, they sell them to anyone who has the money to buy them