Hey Runt, your Dad comes accross as one of the most upstanding guys on here, but in keeping with the topic here goes:
(no offence RT!)
Yo papa's so ugly, even the elephant man paid to see him.
Yo papa's so ugly, I took him to the zoo and the guy at the door said "Thanks for bringing him back. "
Yo papa's so ugly, it looks like he's been bobbing for French fries.
Yo papa's so ugly, people go as him for Halloween.
Yo papa's so ugly, Rice Krispies won't talk to him.
Yo papa's so ugly, he gives Freddy Kreuger nightmares.
Yo papa's so ugly, he has a sign in his yard that says "Beware of Dog. "
Yo papa's so ugly, he has to trick or treat over the phone.
Yo papa's so ugly, he looks like his face caught on fire and they put it out with a fork.
Yo papa's so ugly, he makes onions cry.
Yo papa's so ugly, he threw a boomerang and it wouldn't even come back.
Yo papa's so ugly, he was a guard for Castle Greyskull.
Yo papa's so ugly, he'd scare the monster out of Loch Ness.
Yo papa's so ugly, that if ugly were an Olympic event, he would be the dream team.
Yo papa's so ugly, the government moved Halloween to his birthday.
Yo papa's so ugly, the psychiatrist makes him lie face down.
Yo papa's so ugly, they didn't give him a costume when he tried out for Star Wars.
Yo papa's so ugly, they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in his shower.
Yo papa's so ugly, when I took him to a haunted house he came out with a paycheck.
Yo papa's so ugly, when he gets up, the sun goes down.
Yo papa's so ugly, when he moved into the projects, all his neighbors chipped in for curtains.
Yo papa's so ugly, when he was born he was put in an incubator with tinted windows.
Yo papa's so ugly, when he was born the doctor smacked everyone.
Yo papa's so ugly, when he was born, his mama saw the afterbirth and said "Twins. "
Yo papa's so ugly, when he was born, the doctor smacked the wrong end.
Attention: TDR Forum Junkies 
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