Do You See It Coming?

[bigkid59]

This is something I just received from ny sister.





Subject: Ordering Pizza in 2007



Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national IDnumber?"

Customer: "Hi, I'd like to place an order. "







Operator: "I must have your NIDN first, sir?"

Customer: "My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's 6102049998-45-54610. "







Operator: "Thank you, Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at

1742 Meadowland Drive, and the phone number's 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number's 266-2566. Email address is sheehan@ home.net Which number are you calling from, sir?"

Customer: "Huh? I'm at home. Where d'ya get all this information?"



Operator: "We're wired into the HSS, sir. " Customer: "The HSS, what is that?"





Operator: "We're wired into the Homeland Security System, sir. This will add only 15 seconds to your ordering time"

Customer: (Sighs) "Oh, well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat Special pizzas. "







Operator: "I don't think that's a good idea, sir. " Customer: "Whaddya mean?"







Operator: "Sir, your medical records and commode sensors indicate that youve got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice. "

Customer: "What?!?! What do you recommend, then?"







Operator: "You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it.



Customer: "What makes you think I'd like something like that?"







Operator: "Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion. "

Customer: "All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then. "







Operator: "That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids, and your 2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $49. 99. "

Customer: "Lemme give you my credit card number. "







Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your credit card balance is over its limit. "

Customer: "I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver gets here. "







Operator: "That won't work either, sir. Your checking account's overdrawn also. "

Customer: "Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash

ready. How long will it take?"







Operator: "We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes, sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick 'em up while you're out getting the cash, but then, carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can be a little awkward. "

Customer: "Wait! How do you know I ride a scooter?"







Operator: "It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid for and you just filled the tank yesterday" Customer: Well I'll be a "@#%/$@&?#!"







Operator: "I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a July 4, 2006 conviction for cussing out a cop and another one I see here on September for contempt at your hearing for cussing at a judge. " "Oh yes I see here that you just got out from a 90 day stay in the State Correctional Facility. Is this your first pizza since your return to society?



Customer: (Speechless)







Operator: "Will there be anything else, sir?" Customer: "Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke".







Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics. The New Constitution prohibits this.



Thank you for calling Pizza Hut!"

 

[CFast]

throw a frog in boiling water, it will jump out.

put him in warm water and slowly increase the heat, and he'll cook to death.

yes i see it coming. big brother knows what's best doesnt' he? scary stuff. need more ammo...