E-Mail Joke Of The Day.....

[GAmes]

Subject: Unacceptable tax return


​ Wish I'd thought of this...
The Unacceptable Tax Return:

This example shows the importance of accuracy in your tax return. The IRS has returned the tax return to a man in New York City implying that he answered one of the questions incorrectly.

In response to the question, "Do you have anyone dependent on you?”, the man wrote: "7.1 million illegal immigrants, 1.1 million crack-heads, 4.4 million unemployable scroungers, 80,000 criminals in over 85 prisons, at least 450 idiots in Congress and a group that call themselves politicians."
The IRS stated that the response he gave was unacceptable. The man's response back to the IRS was…

"Who did I leave out?"

 

[DavidC]

I know it gets hot and sometimes it feels like this buttttttttttttttt this is crazy



Dave

 

[mwilson]

 

[mwilson]

 

[mwilson]

 

[mwilson]

One more.....

 

[DavidC]

Count me in. Now where did I put those floaties.

Dave

 

[B.G. Smith]

A patrolman was cruising one day and he observed a car make a minor infraction. He turned on the red lights and sirene and the car took off. The car stopped after a short chase and the officer cautiously approached the vehicle and ask the driver why he tried to evade him. He said, well about 6 months ago my wife ran off with with a policeman and I was afraid you were bringing her back.

 

[DHayden]

A Brunette was desperately trying to get across the street to her favorite nail salon but their was no crosswalk or over pass. She saw her blonde friend come out of the nail salon and she yelled "how do you get to the other side!?"
Her blonde friend yelled back "you are on the other side!"

 

[mwilson]

 

[TFucili]

That could unleash a wave of Little Johnny Rottenmouth jokes

 

[mwilson]

Trying to find non (or somewhat non) offensive stuff to put on here....I've got some doozies that simply cannot go on here....Johnny is probably in several of them...

#thestruggleisreal

 

[fest3er]

Truly Tasteless Jokes, volumes 1-5, and Gross Jokes: a small percentage of them might be allowed in polite company.

 

[mwilson]

 

[NIsaacs]

 

[NIsaacs]

Joke :
A blonde and a redhead met in a bar after work for a drink, and were watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge.
The blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump, and the redhead replied, “I'll take that bet!”

Anyway, sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead the $50 she owed. The redhead said, “I can't take this, you're my friend. I have to admit, I saw this on the 5 o'clock news, so I can't take your money.”
The blonde replied, “Well, so did I, but I never thought he'd jump again!”

 

[PBJ2500CTD]

Put on your Rodney Dangerfield or Fran Drescher caps to read this one:

It snowed last night….


8:00 am: I made a snowman.
8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.
8:15 - So, I made a snow woman.
8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.
8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.
8:22 - The transgender man..women...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.
8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.
8:28 - I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
8:31 - The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be covered up .
8:40 - The Police arrived saying someone had been offended.
8:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.
8:43 - The council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.
8:45 - TV news crew from ABC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied "Snowballs" and am now called a sexist.
9:00 - I was on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.
9:10 - I was asked if I have any accomplices. My children were taken by social services.
9:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything marched down the street demanding for me to be arrested.


Moral:
There is no moral to this story. It is what we have become, all because of snowflakes.​

 

[mwilson]

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[NIsaacs]

 

[mwilson]

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