The Veg'Oil Express (apology to Red Simpson and Junior Brown)
Red's version
I was caravan'n to a party due to Toolman's request,
my 3/4 ton Dodge called the Veg'Oil Express.
There was nothin' but curves a runnin' from the top on down,
and at the bottom of the grade sat a quiet little Derby town.
Well, I was drivin' off the top when she jarred and the driveshaft broke,
started pumpin' up the brakes, saw 'em going in a big cloud of smoke.
To keep 'er upright ... I knew I had to do my best,
against a runaway bomb called the Veg'Oil Express.
(Chorus)
There was a 1000 gallon drum of filtered cooking oil,
over a buncha tires that smoked and squealed.
I had to ride her down and I couldn't jump free,
or there'd be a big hole where that little Torque's Shop used to be.
Well my D250 leaned each time that I took another curve,
my hands started sweatin' and I knew I was losin' my nerve.
And I was cussin' and came within inch of the Toolman's chest,
a fightin' with the wheel of a Dodge called the Veg'Oil Express.
I side-swipped a 3rd Gen trying to slow her down by rubbin' her side,
and when the sparks started flyin' man it looked like the 4th of July.
I finally got her stopped ... but HO-Brian confess'd,
“that's the last time I'm behind Zod and that Veg'Oil Express!!!”.
(Chorus)
(Repeat Chorus - change last line to . . Cause there'd be a big
hole where that little Torque's Shop used to be.