Fart ??

[DieselDoghouse]

I darest not fart at all

I be a creature small

did I, someday

the EPA

would come with chain and ball!!



(Sadly, this is what happens when prep schools try to teach creative writing!!!!)

 

[lschultz]

Ladies your time is running out if you have any comments/info/tricks/suggestions. This is the last page. That reminds me of this old song-This Is The Last Dance Tonight I think that was by Gene Thomas.

 

[TORQUE THIS]

I think the funniest thing is when old people fart in church during mass on Sunday mornings. It is really quiet and all of a sudden... yup you know...

 

[HoleshotHolset]

Back to the top..... I couldn't let this thread die.....



They don't call 'em church PEWs for nothing.....



Matt

 

[dieselgirlanddan]

Originally posted by HoleshotHolset

Back to the top..... I couldn't let this thread die.....



They don't call 'em church PEWs for nothing.....



Matt

ROTFLMFAO:-laf :-laf :-laf :-laf

 

[Whitmore]

one year for Christmas I got me a clean mayo jar and I cut some paper real good so it lined the inside of the jar, that way my buddie would have to open the lid to see in there and then I put a real stinker in there, man it was peeeeeeyooouuuu bad. sealed it up real fast and sent it to my long lost buddie for Christmas :{ It was a long time ago so I cant remember what he said about it but I am still laughing at the thought... ... ... ... ... ... ... . Kevin

 

[merryman]

Sitting at a signal light; a very nice but old Ford pickup pulls up on my right, driven by a very senior citizen. Neatly lettered on the drivers door, just below the window was===



"OLD FART"



Vaughn

 

[dalton4]

Now I know why the polar cap is melting!!



Jerry.

 

[CMAC]

Wet Farts

I learned along time ago , that if you have wet farts , you are better off to not tuck your shirt in , or it will skwirt out of your shirt collar . Then you know it is time to switch brands of beer...

 

[HoleshotHolset]

... . and you thought this thread would die... ??!! NEVER!!



I almost died laughing today at work... .



Here's the scenario:



I'm in the restroom having a squirt... . Some other poor SOB is on the can pitching a loaf... .



He lets out this little squeaker of a fart that is followed up by the most explosive and loud report coming out of a human being I have ever heard... .



It went like this: "Squeeek... ... ... . BA-Boooooooooom!"



I almost burst out laughing... . but I did that little hide-a-laugh thing... where I acted like I was coughing.



You had to be there to appreciate it... .



I almost wanted to congratulate him and ask him what he had to eat... . or maybe what died up there!



Matt

 

[Doc Tinker]

Due to inappropriate subject matter, this thread is closed!



Doc





Oops, I forget that I no longer have the authority to do that



Have fun boys, I hope you can enjoy this kind of thread for a long time to come.

 

[Shovelhead]

Matt, you need to warn us before posting stuff like that! :-laf



I dang near fell outta the chair. :-laf



Wifey thinks I've lost my mind. she might be rightOo.



Welcome back to the "Other" side Doc.



Ed

 

[JHerrlich]

Pretty funny stuff guys... .



Have any of you ever heard of the dreaded MRE (Meals Ready to Eat) fart? Any of you military guys that have been out in the field know exactly what I'm talkin' about. They smell so bad, you make yourself gag.



Try some of those when your in subfreezing weather with all of the cold weather gear you can find on your body. You have a choice, freeze or gag. It all gets trapped in your gear and the only outlet for it is at the hood. :{

 

[nickleinonen]

such a coidence. i was taking a leak today at work and there was someone in the stall taking a wet one. it sounded like someone was pouring runny mud into the toilet. and yes, i remembered this thread and started doing the "coughing" laugh. it brought a tear to my eye [but i am not sure if it was the smell or the laughter:-laf]

 

[Jeff H]

Anybody have a can of fart spray? I once made the mistake of spraying a tiny and I mean tiny amout into the air. Talk about bio terrorism.

 

[HoleshotHolset]

It seems as though I'm not the only one choking back the laughs when someone lets loose on the pot... . :-laf



I'll keep you updated as this is almost a daily occurrence, but the one yesterday takes the cake as the best ever.



Matt

 

[lschultz]

I remember(funny how somethings I remember and some I don't)when I was back in building maint. and we got call on the commode stopped up in the mens restroom. Me and this other fellow went and I never in my life saw such a big turd as big around as your arm and length I don't know. On a scale of 1-10 this would be a 10+. Took a little work to get it down but we managed. Funny thing about it it did not have much aroma.

 

[HoleshotHolset]

NICE!

I think that "Fat *******" left that floater... .

That guy had a crap on deck that could choke a Great Blue Whale!!



Matt

 

[sdalton]

http://www.farts.com/cgi-bin/ubb/ultimatebb.cgi?category=2

 

[jhartley]

Everything you ever wanted to know & some things you may not want to know about farts can be found here -------



www.smellypoop.com/farts.html :{